I ended the relationship a few days ago because there were too many fights and misunderstandings. We've together for 2 years and during that time, there was some abuse (punching, kicking, choking, calling names, insults, etc.) and it became overall toxic and depressive. I know it's good that I got out of it, but I still think that maybe it'll change and it'll work out. As of the moment, I might be clouded with emotions of missing him and all, but I keep thinking maybe I should accept him the way he is even with the abuse. It's not good, nor is it healthy, but I still love him and want him in my life.
I just need someone's advice and opinion and a little push to which direction I should go. And if you think there's hope that he or our relationship can change, even just a bit.
Most Helpful Guy
What caused the fights/violence? Fights, as in arguments can happen, that's natural, but violence is a big red flag. That doesn't sound like love to me, not at all. What does your heart tell you? Do you think you love him, if you have to question it? Or do you reckon it's just the craving for companionship after having broken up? Premature break ups is a thing that can happen in a spur of anger, but by the sound of what you described, it didn't sound like the relationship was overly healthy, if I am to be honest.0
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Most Helpful Girl
No. Love does not compensate for you to return back to an abusive situation. You love from a far overall but the romance must end. What you need really are therapy and self-evaluation. You are 16 years old. You should not be having this kind of issue at your age. This is a time for development or else you're going to have to stay out of dating until you're are 18, in college or out the house. Any problems you're having should be directed to your parents or a trusting adult. You are who you attract. If he is abusive, double check yourself to make sure you're not abusive because I'm sure you are in some ways if not all. And many of us, if not all of us have some type of abusive tendencies and it doesn't always have to be physical or just emotional. You may have feelings for him, but as another user have said which is true, you don't love him. Because you don't love yourself to get away from him. You can't expect your situation to change if you done change first.0