Is there any way to save this relationship?

I got really close with this guy very quickly by means of terrible circumstances. Yesterday was 3 months since we met, but he got me through some of my darkest hours and I him.

We had a complicated relationship when I moved 300 miles away 2 months ago. 2 wks after moving, I dropped everything to go visit when he asked, and we had our 1st kiss. His actual 1st (we're 20 but late bloomers). That's when my feelings rocketed off, and I wanted to label it. With the distance, he didn't, and I understood.

Except I was just deluding myself about being ok with it because I valued him as a friend. And the arguments about status continued. I visited again a couple weeks ago, and while we didn't quite kiss, we did have a very intimate moment. He admitted we were a couple in all except title.

Last weekend was my sorority's formal. When he gave me a reason not to come when I asked about month ago, I knew it was an excuse. Because it would have meant something. But while the hurt feelings simmered, I technically let it go. The day of, his story changed. He didn't lie, but when his old excuse fell through, he scrambled for a new one. And I was pissed.

I gave him the cold shoulder for a couple days, and by the time I was ready to talk, he was mad too. He said he couldn't constantly be ridiculed for what he didn't do. I said I couldn't be the only one to try. Because he had been distant lately too, but he was going through a tough time with other stuff. I wanted to call, he said no. I took that as an unofficial breakup and wrote a letter splaying my feelings, from why I was hurt to why I fell so hard so fast in the first place. It was heartfelt, and our goodbye was crying filled. Over snapchat. But still, he didn't want it and prolonged it.

But looking at it now, he did care, and 3 months was too soon to push given our distance. I regret it, but since I've put him through this already and now actually ended it, I can't reach out. He'll feel I'm playing with his head and rightfully so.


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  • Learn a lesson and don't do it again to someone else


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