Girls, Ex Seeing another guy within 2 weeks. In relationship after 6. We were together 13 years and have a son together?

hi there, just looking to hear from a woman and hopefully someone whos been through this.
i was with my ex for 13 years, the last 4 years i have suffered severe depression due to a suicide in the family. It took me so long to get help, 2 weeks before she left me actually. I emotionally neglected her, although not intentionally. I didn't care about myself so how could i care about her.

The guy she is with now, she has known him for a while, but only in contact periodically. Anyway i want to know is it really possible for her to be over us this quickly?

She says this new guy makes her feel really happy. Although she appeared at my house a week ago and gave me oral sex. Then a day later said she wants to be with him. That was 5 days ago and now she is saying she wants to be with him.

she says its because she's scared id hurt her again and doesn't trust me not to. She says its easier to choose him because there's no baggage and because he treats her like gold!

Help please?


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What Girls Said 1

  • Just because she left roughly two weeks ago, doesn't mean it was quick. You have been depressed and neglecting her for four years. She didn't get over you in two weeks and move on, it took her four years to move on, and even then she's not completely over you (since she gave you oral not too long ago).

    • By the way, I don't want to make you feel bad for neglecting her, I'm sure you feel bad enough already. I just want you to understand it from her perspective. She didn't decide overnight that she should leave, it wasn't like 2 weeks and a day ago she was perfectly fine with the relationship and then the next day decided to break up with you. It was a gradual thing happening for four years until she finally she decided to leave.

    • I understand that i really do. Its just hard to accept.
      She says she still loves me. We have a 3 year old son together too.

      Do i have any chance to save my family? I want to think this guy is just someone to help her try and get over the hurt of us, but i dont know.

      she's cried to me on the phone, saying she does love me and wishes id got help sooner.

      Is there anything i can do to save us? Or do i have to move on. Its really hard bcos i love her so much and i miss my son too. For the first time in years i feel good about myself, but bad at the same time bcos im scared its to late!

    • There is still a lot of good things left in your relationship to work with. She didn't leave because she didn't love you, she left because she got tired of waiting for you to get help. And then when you finally did get help, she probably didn't want to wait around for who knows how long until you returned to your old self.

      I do think you should attempt to save your family. She still loves you, and you love her, and you are getting help. Perhaps ask her if there's anything you can do to restore her trust. Perhaps also find ways to keep her updated on your progress. Plus, from her actions, it seems like you still might have a chance, she isn't over you yet.

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