Too soon to ask ex to talk?

Last night my boyfriend of almost two years broke up with me. When we first started dating he was so sweet. He was constantly buying me flowers, sending me good morning and goodnight texts, planning dates, and telling me how beautiful I was. We even talked about moving in together after about a year and he said that he wanted to marry me. Fast forward about three months and he wanted to stop talking about getting married and moving in together because he didn't see a future anymore, and he stopped doing little things for me and planning dates. About a month after that I talked to him about it and we had our first fight. He promised he would work on it, and he got better for awhile, but then it happened again, and he promised he would work on it again. And then the cycle repeated. We began to fight more frequently and I began to lower my standards. We almost broke up during a few of the fights. Finally, Last night after a fight he decided to break up with me. He said that he needs to figure out why he can't be in a long term committed relationship, that he didn't feel like we connected anymore ( even though I have been trying to start conversations and find common interests and he wouldn't listen or respond), and that he doesn't want me to be dragged through the dirt by him. He then said that he is still in love with me romantically and that its not my fault and that he would rather be with me than without me. I suggested that he get a counselor and that we work out the issues in the relationship and get to the bottom of it together. He considered it but came back and said that it would be best if we broke up.
I guess my question here is if there is any hope for us? I love him and care about him so much. He is my best friend and I honestly want to marry him someday. I'm going to see him next Tuesday because of an event we both have to go to, and I want to ask him to get a coffee with me and talk it out some more. Would it be too soon for that?
Just to clarify the question really quick: is a week too soon to try to talk to him about it?


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  • Yes, it is way too soon. Give him some more time to give his thoughts and feelings a place. You spoke to him yesterday, so it's too soon. It's hard to tell whether he would want to have you back, as this is still so fresh.


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