When you can't talk to anyone where do you go?

I've been to friend, family and psychiatrists. I don't know what to fo anymore. People keep telling me to do this and that, let go of certain memories and just live. I just can't though, everyday it haunts me... there was more I could have done... more I should have said. Don't live in the past but I walk in the present with broken legs. How can one just let go and forget everything and not get eaten away by the guilt. Why is it so difficult to just toss it away and live life carefree like everyone else. They blame the other party but I can't stop blaming myself... yet when I talk, I'm just a little bitch. When I ask for help the only answer is going out, drink alcohol and get laid... Every topic becomes about sexualizing women and what they can do for me... why can't I just be like them... why do i care so much, that I can't let go... why does it overwhelm me... people grow tired, i lose friends... annoy family... psychiatrist is a quack... where do I go from here? I've just been finishing projects I started buy never finished... but there is no satisfaction from anything I accomplish... so I continue to just drown myself in work to stay distracted, i don't know who to talk to anymore.
When you can't talk to anyone where do you go?
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