Do you ever wish there was a chance to get back together with your ex ?

I recently was cleaning out my hard drive and I found a folder I saved. It was mostly pictures but also some text files I saved that I had forgotten about. The text files contained the last couple of chats between my ex and I over Facebook. I remember saving them to look at them later to help me get over her. I haven't looked at them since I saved them last October. I couldn't believe it but some of the things she wrote still affected me deeply. I felt the butterflies forming again deep in my stomach as I kept reading every word and it occurred to me I still had/have feelings for her. Even though the words were negative, it instilled a reaction; everything came rushing back. It sucks that it still affects me so much.

How many of you still wish you were with your ex? Did you ever really move on ? Who initiated the breakup? Are you in a relationship right now and still having these feelings ?

Please answer truthfully and remember you can remain anonymous.

  • I still have feelings for him/her and I never really moved on.
    Vote A
  • I still have feelings for him/her and I am currently dating or in a relationship.
    Vote B
  • I've moved on and have found somebody better.
    Vote C
  • I don't prefer to live in the past.
    Vote D
Select a gender to cast your vote:
I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't have an "ex" per se, because I was the other woman in his relationship. Yes, it's horrible, and I still feel bad about it, but it's already done and I can't change it now. We were flirting and sexting long before he started dating her; the two of them ended up going out because she lives a lot closer to him. He's the only guy I've ever been even semi-intimate with (don't knock sexting. It can be heavy stuff) and it still rips me up inside the way he threw me in the gutter when he was done with me. I knew we never had a future together, but I'd have rather had it just fizzle out than end the way it did. I still think about him a lot and wish that things had worked differently (and that I had been the actual girlfriend, not the other woman), but I know that it's over. He's cut off all contact with me so I can't ask him if he feels the same or if I'm the only one still hurt over this whole ordeal, so I'm just hoping and praying that I find someone else to fill the void - or at least try to help heal the hurt - soon. The guy I was kind of with was very manipulative and an asshole to me, but I still miss the way he made me feel. So no, I haven't moved on. I just wish I could.

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 16

  • I initiated the break-up...he had another gurl...but he left the gurl after I broke up with him and courted any once again...but I never gave him another chance. now,i have this man that I'm so in love with...way much better that my ex...but there are times that I compare my current boyfriend with my ex when we fight...and when I saw my ex's pic after a year of break-up...i stil cried...but it never mean that I love him still..but because of regret that we wer supposed to be together until now...if he just didn't cheat on me...!

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  • i still had feelings for my ex when we broke up, but not every person you date is going to be with you forever. It hurts, but you have to move on as repetitive as that may sound. I tried focusing on me more, running and listening to music. You have to look past things sometimes and not let them grasp you for so long

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    • I completely agree ... its just, there really hasn't been anyone else ... it makes me feel like damaged goods sometimes.

      As much as I want to move on and convince myself that I have ... it all comes back to her because there isn't anyone else :-/

    • It takes time to find someone

    • You are not damaged goods sweetheart. It takes time, and not everyone can just 'get over' an ex, just because you are not one of those people does not make you damaged or anything else negative. I know you will feel better soon - new relationship or not, I hope you can see that you will too :)

  • I wouldn't want to be with my ex. There are reasons why they are my ex and I'm not with them anyone. My last ex broke up with me because he's a pot head and was high at the time. It's been almost three years since that relationship and I've been with someone for over 2 years and 6 months. My ex wants to get back together now but I have no feelings for him anymore. Too late for him

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  • I wanted to be with the guy my ex was before we broke up. After he changed completly and is a total stranger. I've moved on and am in another relationship now. He initiated it...no more feelings for him.

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    • Same thing happened to me, which is why I broke up with him. Its nice how they change right away after being in a relationship with someone. But I didn't move on and still in love.

  • yes sometimes I do feel like I wish I can be with my ex. well you can say I moved on but didnt. sometimes I think about how it would I been if we were still together and sometimes I think he probably has a better life without each other so why bother. no I am not in a relationship having these feelings.

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  • i don't even think about them, it's not worth it.

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  • My dear friend, those feelings will always be there.

    But that's why we take chances and try to move on.

    Look at me for example, I found happiness finally.

    Don't give up, you'll find someone soon,

    just be patient, you're a really sweet guy.

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  • i believe in 'love at first sight' because I loved him and he left me! :'( I miss him like hell I will never move on :'(

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  • voted D

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  • hell no.

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  • You don't miss her. You miss the person you thought she was.

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  • yes, but at the end of the day, there is a reason why we're not together

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  • I still have feelings for my ex. It's so stupid actually It's hard to admit I don't want to still have feelings for him, but I guess he really got to me. In all fairness, he actually helped me become a better person I know that might sound really cheesy, but he helped me see that life can be fun. Thing is, I also knew it wasn't as serious for him as it was for me. He was one of those people that come into your life for say a little while, and then go away and the lessons they teach you kind of stay with you. But, the relationship was way too intense for anything to last more than it did or to be 'long term'. Anyone who gets into a long term relationship with somebody, does so because it feels right, and it didn't feel right to do it with him. So, that's the story, but like I said, I still have some feelings for him, but in my defense, I am getting over him a little bit more every single day and am awaiting the day where I can finally say I am over him (which will come soon, hopefully.) I am ready to start a relationship with someone else and love them, and only be with them. That's what I desire <3

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  • your first love? was that it?

    you never have anyone like your first love. that's special. but, eventually, you will meet somone. you will be happier. people get their hearts broken all the time. and it takes a long time to heal. my first love, we dated for 3 years 4 months and 3 days.. I remember this.. because it was soon after my 20th birthday when he shattered my heart into millions of peices. its been a bit over 2 years. and I'm still heartbroken. but I don't let it get to me. because if you do, it just keeps eating at you and your life just isn't the same. you have to remember life isn't to keep focusing on the past, even if it hurts still. you need to take new obstacles in your life. even if it takes step by step. take your time. you WILL move on. someone is out there for you. you just haven't grabbed onto her just yet. but she's there.

    i wish you luck and happiness in your future with someone much much much better :)

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    • She wasn't my first ... she was my second :). Thanks for your wishes.

  • Yes I still wish that I was with my ex. It has been about a year and half since we broke up(it was mutual) and I am still totally in love with him.

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    • Do you guys still talk ?

    • Yes we still talk and hang out often. Which I think just makes things worse.

    • Atleast you two are civil though ...

  • My ex was very abusive emotionally, and pysically... getting away from him was the best thing I had ever done. However I do wish I was more mature with the break up rather then yelling screaming and calling him names trying to make me feel better after all the hurt he'd put me through... I wish I had been more; "I'm leaving you because I can't handle this pain. Sorry I don't want to be friends." But I didn't I am glad I found my new man... he treats me like no man has ever treated me before and its amazing.

    As for advice even though you didn't ask... I would say try talking again.. I mean I don't know why you broke up but if it was on a good note... why not try connecting again if you still have feelings?

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    • I was cheated on ... after she realized the guy didn't want her she tried to get me back and I foolishly fell for it. It was never the same. A few weeks later she left me for a co-worker and has been living with him since.

      I don't think the ball is in my court to initiate contact. I shouldn't have these feelings anymore. She doesn't deserve them.

    • No, she doesn't...

What Guys Said 4

  • no I hate her and think she is a b****

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  • Not a very inclusive question. What about people who don't have an ex? :(

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  • in all seriousness man... I've loved two girls. I'm a f***ing sucker and ill admit it. but my second girlfriend. she was, amazing. and everything! she was almost perfect! I loved her so much. and she left me for some guy she was going to school with. I still have feelings for her. every time I heard our song, I had to change it. every time we went to "our place" I left. damn, come to think if it I never go there anymore. but my point is, when you love someone this much and deep down yuo know you'll never get them back, even though you want them back so desperately, you have to let go. ill never stop loving her. but I know ill love someone more than her. let go of all things you had with her. you'll slowly let go. things take time. as cliche as it might be, its true.

    oh... and she moved in with that guy after we broke up. and I found out from a friend just about 2 months ago... their engaged now.

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  • she initiated it and technically were on a break and it was recent but yeah I still feel a lot for her and I often vent to myself whether about how much I love her or how much I dislike her they make me feel the same way about her the truth is we still feel for each other a lot and I want her back I just hope she does too

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    • So what's stopping you ?

    • We can't really see each other she lives in a different state and all we can really do is hope for the best once school starts again..... I don't know anymore she has started liking another guy and I'm still madly in love with her and I desperately want them to fail as f***ed up as it sounds but I don't want her to be happy if she's not with me its selfish I know but I she makes me so happy and I do the same for her sooo for now at least I'm stuck living with a broken heart hopefully we fix things in septembe

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