How does someone hurt you and make you out to be the bad one after a breakup?

I walked into the relationship trusting him and i was happy, but it turned bad.

Something always felt off about him, he was a photographer who did xrated pictures in his own house.
Had a studio and everything, which would be off putting to many people but i stook by him and knew it was a passion of his.. never bothered me until i seen the real side of him.

Stayed over his one day and i was looking for my underwear and he threw me a pair.. when i took it towards the light i realised they were used and werent mine.
They also had that smell to them..
He claimed they were from a photoshoot but a model wouldn't have left them...

He then invited a random girl around for a shoot.. not a model.. a random girl
The thing is.. that shouldn't be so dodgy
But he lied and lied about it...
From the messages he sent her it was pretty flirty and it was just them two alone in his house

The arguments continued and not just over him being dishonest..
He never treated me like a girlfriend.. it was always me blowing my wages on everything and doing nice things for him.
Even though he had money, he made sure i paid for almost everything

There was other things that happened too with him.. but im gonna talk about the breakup

I was browsing the internet Sunday night and somebody sent me a screenshot... on that screenshot was a dating profile.. on the other screenshot was how active it was
It was my boyfriend, saying he's looking for a relationship, sub and a playmate.
I confronted him and he wasn't assed about it, just said i dont use it.

Not long after a friend told me somthing else that made me feel uncomfortable

So my boyfriend said he's done, never talk to him again

he's still got all my stuff, has tried to ban me from gigs, has made everyone turn against me and has acted like he never loved me to begin with.

When he wanted to be it felt sometimes he was in love with me

But now i know everything was a lie and he just used me


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What Guys Said 3

  • This sounds very much like a guy who only uses women as accessories to his ego. You are very likely right in thinking that he never loved you. He is probably incapable of love at this stage of his live, instead relying on narcissism as his coping mechanism. He lives a trivial life of hedonistic pleasures and will probably try to sustain this long beyond his prime. Eventually he'll end up an old perv, forever thinking that he's 'still got it'.

    It sounds to me like you have dodged a bullet. The feelings of shit people are irrelevant. Whether or not you were truly valued by a shitty person just doesn't matter. There is no value to be gained from a person with no value.

  • There too many people who are good at playing the blame game. All you can do is ignore them.

  • They are very manipulative.


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