My boyfriend of a little over a year broke up with me via text message on Saturday. For around a week before that he had said he "didn't know what he wanted" and needed time to think because we had fought a lot the past winter and he thought I was too sensitive, and took things the wrong way sometimes. That week I begged for him to stay and promised I would not longer get mad but he wasn't talking to me. We had exams that week and we live far apart so school is a mutual place and I realized I had his blazer and texted him to ask him to meet me to get it because I didn't want to forget it at school for the summer. He had to go to a lunch that day and he never texted me to get it but he did text me and say "idk I need a break" and I got really upset and he took it back because he didn't want me to be sad. But we didn't talk much Friday because I was so upset but I didn't want to loose him. Then Saturday morning he told me he needed to breakup and since then I texted him to ask him who to give his stuff to and no response. I texted him the day after that and asked to be friends because I don't want to be enemies or have things be awkward and no response. Then the next day I texted him and just said that "I'm trying to get over this and I don't want to be clingy and have your stuff and you're the one who dumped me so don't you want to make it final?idk I don't get it...and I don't want to wait to give it back because then it will be even more awkward I'm just trying to make this easy for you" no response to that text either. His best friend just got out of a relationship and none of his other good friends have girlfriends right now so I think his friends might have had something to do with it. I have no idea what to do now. Help!
Most Helpful Guy
STOP CONTACTING HIMMMMMMMMM, you're giving him the power, you need to STOP CONTACTING HIM NOW...you've texted him 3 times w/o a response, please for your own good stop...this is the time you just stop texting EVEN IF HE DOES...number 1) you're doing this because it will help you clear your mind, you need this for yourself...number 2) you're doing this to sort of trick him into thinking you don't care anymore and you're just like whatever...number 3) you're doing this because its necessry weather you get back or not...
being friends with an ex is hard especially shortly after the break up - too many emoitions still in the air...give him time, let him see what life is like w/o you, if you're always there he'll never know and just assume you'll always be there...if he texts you and you absolutly haev to respond, wait 15-20 min then give him a quick short answer .
him- how are you?
you (15 min later) - good
him - what are you up to
you - no response...
this will make him tick, his mind will be wondering why you aren't responding, what you're doing, if you still care...by only saying good instead of good how are you, he'll be totally confused
right now HE has the power because HE broke up with you, he feels that you're the one going to try adn get him back, so switch the tables...sure you can hope to get back with him, but prepare for the worst, you're young I'm sure ther are plenty of other guys willing to give you what you want, hey you never know, maybe this is exactly what you need w/o knowing it
just take things slow, don't talk to him often, be short, stay active, stay busy...try going tot he gym, when my ex broke up with me it helped tremendously and I still go because tis such a good stress reliever, I become more confident and I feel great...
anyways I hope this helps, just try cutting contact a little more, show him you're not desperate and HES the one missing out...otherwise take this relationship as a lesson and remember what NOT to do in the next one you get into :)
- Show AllShow Less