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Let's define cheating. Imagine two people who are friends but sleep with other random people all the time (fwb). They have no commitment or expectation of being loyal to each other so they don't risk or lose anything by sleeping around. With cheating you are betraying the trust/agreement you have with your partner. You're risking your relationship and you could lose it. Why does cheating matter? Because it affects your partner in ways you promised not to. IF your partner says you can have sex on the side it's not cheating
Because the betrayal and loss of trust invovled in cheating shows how little your partner actually cares for/respects you. Even if my boyfriend only cheated on me once, I wouldn't be able to view him as my 'boyfriend', or someone who I consider myself in a committed/exclusive relationship with after that. He would become nothing but a fuck-buddy to me after that, regardless of him being down to fuck around the clock.
I know where you are coming from with this question. I am married and I am having an affair with a married man. We are only in it for the sex, Lust, and passion. We both realize fully that it is wrong. But it does not mean we plan to stop. Our partners do not make us feel desired or satisfied sexually. We both love our spouses very much, everything else in our marriages is perfect and there are children involved. It will always be strictly confidential and something we will take to our Graves.
Here's the problem. To cheat you have to be selfish and lie. You are developing those skills and they will become as normal to you as breathing. They will infect every aspect of your life if they did not already. Once your partner figures out you lie all the time he will not trust you and your marriage will collapse. But I get it, you don't think any bad stuff will happen to you.
Cheating breaks trust. Once that is gone, you can never get it 100% back...
Because the restrictions of monagamy.
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