so I'm having a bad time each day with this why would she just up and go and get on with her day and not make any contact, after 3 years she knows im just sat here waiting for anything and im really strullging now for love... what can i do for contact she responds to nothing?

so i dated this wonderful girl for 3 years i took her everywhere with me overseas really looked after her treated her kind loved her told her i loved her all the normal good things. Then she cheated on me out the blue while working at sea in america to which she confessed to some 6 months later i was upset shocked but thought i could forgive her giving the realtionship time and investment plus if you love a person you work on things right? anyhow long storey short its been terrbile for months she dropped me in feb and I've begged pleaded for 3 months now. She came home from sea in April and we kind of made things up spending a little time with each other and she slept over etc etc. But now she's gone all cold and horrid again for at least 8 days now she lets me text at least 10 times a day but never responds to anything then sends me this last night :

\HOW F;;;;;; DARE YOU!!! You f;;;;;; insensitive prick!!! Get the f;;;; out of my life and stay out of it!!! You are not important to me in what is happening right now FUCK OFF!

i send her nothing but love and the only contact i get get know is via e mails which i dont get a reply from them im so confussed i wake up to a room filled with our things, her pictures over my bed what am i doing? its been 8 days no contact at all and she's 140 miles away at work mon to fri that plenty of space, given i jiust waited for her return from sea for 5 months please what can i do please please please :(


Most Helpful Girl

  • Firstly, she's the one in the wrong. I know you said you put time and investment into this relationship but looking at how it has become, I think it's all run down the drain..
    I wanted to point out that her cheating on you is wrong, you may be however miles away from each other, she still shouldn't have done it. And if she loved you enough, she would have told you straight away, not 6 months later. Just wanna say, this girl ain't worth, and she's got you wrapped around her finger, leading you on. So I would suggest, no more hurting and stress from being in a LDR.. And just break up with her. There will be other people out there, but you just gotta do what's best for YOU. Not her. YOU

    • Thank you... yes most people would not talk a cheater back and i shouldn't of i mean a mistake she said it was but i found out that the so called mistake happend 3 or 4 times so thts not a mistake hey thats a choice. its so hard for me because one persons choice for selfish acts has taken away everything i loved and adored i honestly never thought id be here with a 27 year old women thast acting like she's 16. i fully get everything and understand what i need to do :) but ill never understand why she's acting this way to me i mean im 35 is this what people do today when there done with a person? 3 years she didn't even make any attempt to work on anything just up left and took off 140 miles away for work related things

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    • The thing you do deserve better. I don't know what to say about the rape bit, it's a very sensitive subject. But if she's saying it, then that is saying something. You do though, it seems you both been through a lot, and she needs to let go of you as well and you need to let go of her. It's going to be hard, but that's what friends and family are for.

    • I've looked at your profile and all your posts are about this ex of yours, let her go. You don't need her and her shit.

Most Helpful Guy

  • You can't make someone want you, unfortunately. Bombarding her with contact to which she isn't even replying will only make her angry and it will make her like you less and less. You have to give her space, it's your only option. Clinging on to someone by your fingernails does not guarantee that you won't lose them, it is just as likely to result in your fingernails being torn out. If someone wants to be with you it shouldn't be this hard to keep them.

    The amount of pain that you feel is understandable but it is not a bargaining chip. Break ups hurt, it's inevitable. The still happen and they are still allowed to happen. She has the right to choice, as do you. Your pain is yours to deal with and you need to start dealing with it. It will take time, it will take focus, but you can get past it. Don't be looking to her to ease your pain. Once she chooses to not be with you anymore then it's not her responsibility and you can have no expectations of her.

    • Thank you for your reply.. yes i understand it fully.. but she also said a few weeks back she doesn't want to see me ever again or talk to me and then 2 weeks later she came round she stayed over we had romance etc etc and then she took off again. Its like the smallest thing i do causes a fight and gives her the excuse to say right its over etc etc you know what i mean its odd which has no lead to 8 days no conatct and bocked

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What Girls Said 2

  • You won't leave her alone, of course she's snapping at you. I don't agree with her approach but she's done and you obsessively won't let go. Respect yourself, be a man and and move on instead of chasing her like a sad little lost puppy. Doing this is likely killing all attraction she could have for you, it's making you look pathetic, and you could be bordering creepy by refusing to let her move on.

    • Also: her cheating on you is another reason why you need to respect yourself and stop chasing this girl like she's worth the time. She's not,

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    • You don't want her to make contact. If she does, you shouldn't answer her. If you do answer her it should be to say: "You're not worth my time, bye."

      ... Seriously.

    • ok
      thank you

  • You're borderline stalking her. She's done with you. She's not interested.

    • yes thats what I'm afraid of because thats what will come next hey

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    • Leave her alone. She already told you. That would be a creep move.

    • don't think about this whole case buddy otherwise you will stuck to this state of mind while she will be sleeping somewhere else and moaning. so better you let it go. it doesn't make difference either way.

What Guys Said 1

  • my dude just don't let urself down. you will find better one than that one if you truly want a better one. if you will miss her too much ur mind will never let u go off her feelings and memories. be a dick for couple weeks to beat this time. then u are old you.

    • thanks buddy... everyone here makes sense but another failed relationship drives me nuts when it wasn't my fault and i waited for her for months while she worked and enjoyed her time at sea in the usa so bascailly I've waited and held my life up for what should of been and when it was my turn to start living with her she drops me and blocks me

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    • yes but I mean the only time anyone usually gets kit is for when there up to no good right pictures etc etc you know what i mean

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