How to break up with someone with depression?

What if the other party has depression and has gone out of it, but the depression will probably be triggered again when mentioning this breakup. Advice on how to approach this?


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • I have a female friend who's boyfriend had depression (self harm was involved too). She wanted to break up with him but didn't want to make him feel bad.
    In the end, she realised that it would be better if they broke up, because her mental state would be better off (and she wanted to see another guy, but not cheat)

  • Make it a straight cold turkey cut. If you're trying to spare feelings, then the most you should say is that you don't "feel the same" anymore and that you wouldn't feel right leading him on, when you no longer feel that way about him anymore. Because he deserves someone who can love him fully.

    Then leave. If he fights it and asks you to come back, then you should put emphasis on that 1. It wouldn't be right 2. "What kind of person would I be if I did that?" 3. I can't.

    It's better to have one bad excuse, than a million good excuses. So your best bet is to focus on stating you don't feel the same and that it would be wrong (feels wrong) to stay with someone and lead them on, when you don't feel that way for them. He's going to feel like crap no matter what, but this way isn't cruel and you're still being honest.

    • thanks for your input!

What Girls Said 1

  • I'm sure you care about this person deeply, but I think you have to make yourself a priority.

    I can't post a link, but look for a video with the title "Was It Selfish Of You To Break Up With Him Before His Exam" by DatingLogic on YouTube.

    You can't wait until he is in a healthy state of mind, because you don't know when that will be.

    You probably know members of his family or some of his friends who care about him. I suggest that you talk to them about it beforehand and ask them to give him emotional support and to keep checking on him to make sure that he is okay after you've told him.

    I guess all you can do is to make sure that he knows that you love and care about him still, but in a different way now. And if you don't mind him contacting you after that, you can tell him that you're still there for him as a friend.

    Hope that helps in some way.


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