Is he confused? Or just trying not to hurt me? help understanding my ex?

I broke up with my boyfriend two weeks ago. I never saw him and he wasn't treating me right. It was hard because his mother was in control of his life and she would find ways to make him busy. It made us both mad. I thought it was the right thing to do. But now I feel like I lost a part of myself. I miss him so much. I'm still in love with him as I have been for these past 10 months. I talked to him earlier today because when we parted, we decided it was the wrong time but we should remain in each other lives as friends. After talking about us and what happened, he told me that even though we were in love, he was afraid of love because of how "new" it was to him. How can you be afraid of love when we've dated for so long?

Please translate this for me


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Most Helpful Guy

  • i totally understand where he is coming from.Love is a like a rose...the surface is sweet, but underneath it are thorns. I tell girls this and they look at me like I'm dumb, I tell em "if you ever wanna love someone, you have to prepare yourself for heartbreak" . you girls can take heartbreak (lord knows how) guys cant. that's why we are very very careful bout who we "love". but girls just jump into it even if its not real...i guess y'all got better faith than us. I'm not afraid of love, used to be...but I figured out a trick a while back...and that's what I've been using.

    Go with the friend option for a while..for all you know, you guys may end up working your way into love together...not one person jumping in and hoping the other will too.

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    • So because I broke up with him, he's trying to protect himself now? We both know we still have feelings for eachother. He knows I do especially... I'm way to honest. But I don't know how I can not be. He was my best friend for well over a year.

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    • Thats what we do here isn't it... :) good luck

    • I've forgotten to ask you what the trick that you used? And I didn't speak to him for a few days and yesterday I sent a funny forward to him and 9 other friends, and he responsed even though I didn't think he would. So we talked and when I told him I was ok and I was over it (because a few days ago I broke down and told him everything and he told me to let go and be happy, I did. It was like a swtich went off), he was like "Um. oh ok..." and he sent a picture he had taken for school to me. Why?

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What Guys Said 3

  • love has a lot of responsibilities attached to it...if you don't understand why people break up, it's because they fell behind in their responsibilities to each other...your ex is trying to throw you a lifeline to keep it going in a manner to deal with his mother between you two

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    • Well, he fell behind his responsibilites to me. which is why I left. Being unable to see each other is hard enough. I wanted little things from him, like letters (which I would write to him once a week. while I was living across the country for a couple months. he sent only one), and just to let me know he was there and wanted to talk to me and loved me. We are each other first love, so I'm confused. What do you mean, keep it going?

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    • Trihill's

    • Haha me too

  • Clearly he is having personal problems within family and is too young to stand up for himself. You should either wait for him without having a relationship with him now or move on, if possible.

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  • i want to say onething don't breake up. it is worse thing in the life. if you really love him and he loves you same thn try to get him as soon as possible

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