Did I mess up?

i went to this music festival last week.i met these group of boys that my friend knew.i fancied the pants off one of the boys soon as I met him.we started flirting and the first night I pulled him,the second night we ended up sleeping together.the night after he didn't seem to want to know me,and then the rest of the week he totally blanked me for no reason.wen I came home I added I'm on fb and we have spoken a few times,but its always me making the effort..i really like him..do I have a chance?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • of course you messed up! that was the wrong thing to do when you seriesly like a guy, but I think you might have a small chance if you take the time to speak to him and be totaly honest, now this guy probably things you are " a BAD girl" like you do the one night stand thing very often which doesn't make him feel very special you see, so if I were you I will speak to him and say the things you just said like that he was your first one night stand, you are not that type of girl, you likeed him instantly and that you were very drunk, and the drinking part is what made you act on that attraction, then say that you are hoping that what happened doesn't give him the wrong idea about you, and that you realy would like to get to know him more and do things different this time. you already slept with this guy sweety so if you don't realy talk to him about it, it will prove to him that you are just another play girl, so you should talkj to him as soon as possible so he wouldn't think that and you know he wouldn't sleep with you if he didn't like you a bit.

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    • I don't know if saying all this over fb chat is a good idea,we only speak for about 5mins see?

    • Am not talking about talking on Facebook honey, am talking about speaking to him in person!, if not to still have a shot with him, at least to earn some respect from him and get some honor, because sweet heart he probably thinks you are a s%#t by now! which you are not!! am sure you are a good girl but you were in a bad situation, you need to find away to speak to him in person believe mee get your confidence back and do it you slept with him already what are you afraid of it.

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What Guys Said 2

  • hard to say. after sleeping with a guy, in groups of people it can be hard for us to openly show any kind of affection due to simply being shy. but also these things happen at festivals, me and my mates all have a 'what happens there, stays there' kind of thing attitude towards them. but with accepting you on f/b is a good sign :) .

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    • The night after I was very drunk,and all his mates were asking questions...so I don't know if this mite have p*ssed him off?and I got the feeling that he was being more distant to me,so I kept going to his mates 'does he like me,hes not talking to me' I think this prob annoyed him...i am the least slag you will ever meet..but I'm scared now that he mite think I'm a slag,even tho I told his mates I wasn't.we have spoken on fb,nothing big...but at least he speaks back.and kept the photos I tagged of me and him.

    • Sounds like maybe it was a bit much too soon for him, us men get a bit distant if women lay it on too thick too soon if you know what I mean? the questioning his mates would have got straight back to him and that was probably the thing that's making him think twice.

  • Was your logic something along the lines of "if I have sex with him he'll want to be my boyfriend"? Cause that's the completely wrong approach to take if you want someone to respect you and potentially be your boyfriend.

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    • No,not atall.he was my first one night stand.we were both very drunk,and one thing led to another...really gutted..i really like him.

What Girls Said 3

  • Honestly move on I know it's bitch but such is life. He got what he wanted and f***ed off. Don't read too much into the whole Facebook thing afterall it doesn't require too much effort on his part and he may just have added you so he could call on you should he ever require getting laid. He had plenty of time to get to know you if he wanted but he didn't bother and this has nothing to do with shyness, he wasn't too shy to have sex with you now was he. Stop initating the contact and see what+happens.+If+he+disappears+pick+yourself+up+dust+yourself+off+and+say+his+loss.

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  • As much as casual sex is accepted in today's society, a guy still doesn't typically respect a girl that he was able to sleep with so easily. And getting drunk and not knowing what you were doing is becoming a cliched, tired excuse. I'm not calling you a slut at all and I'm really sorry this happened. But alcohol clearly impairs judgment in a way where you aren't in control anymore and even if both of you were sloppy drunk, it's never really a great quality for a guy to see a LADY out of control of her own body. So I won't say you blew it but I think it's going to be hard to get him to see you as a lady and not just a one night stand. Plus, maybe he's avoiding you because he's beating himself up. Good luck, and sorry about that. It sucks when one mistake alters a person's whole image of you. But maybe it's salvageable!

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    • What do you mean he's beating himself up?

    • I mean that maybe he is feeling bad about it too and he's dealing with it in a different way. lol but not physically hurting himself

  • NOPE...U SLEPT WITH HIM TOO SOON. HE DOESNT SEE You AS GIRLFRIEND/MARRIAGE MATERIAL ANYMORE.

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