Why do I still think about my ex occasionally, is it normal?

We broke up just over 2 months ago, and he's recently got into a new relationship, but i still think about him.. how do i stop? its really irritating! And when we were friends and still talking why did he tell me every time he had a date? i just find it weird. I wanna stop over thinking our whole relationship, i just wanna get over it!😔 How did you do it, if you have any advice?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I completely understand what you're going through, I still thought about my ex girlfriend after we broke up for a couple of months. I asked myself the same exact questions your asking yourself now. It's not wrong to think of your ex, because you created memories together. Whether they're happy or sad memories, they're still memories that made an input on you. Instead of thinking like it's a bad thing, I think that you should learn from it. Use though memories to help you grow as a person and become stronger as person as well. Like when you're trying to find someone else, you could have better judgment on who to look out for and who to avoid. Thinking about your ex could reveal that maybe what you thought you liked in a guy isn't what you like at all. However, if you're like me and thinking about your ex and still have feelings for that person, I can tell you that it'll go away, but it'll take time. I recommend that you do whatever it takes to get your mind off of it, like hanging out with friends or going on adventures, trying new things, etc. It's completely normal that you still think of your ex, many people still do and some never stop. the first thing I do recommend that you do is to stop getting irritated over it, because it just means your acknowledging it. I hope this was helpful, and of course this is just my opinion, so you don't have to listen to me.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You say occasionally in the subject of your question but in the more details you provided it sounds like you think about him and/or your relationship a lot.

    It is normal either way if right after a break up. The occasional thought will never go away but the obsessing over it will only hurt your more so I suggest you do something to occupy your time. Work longer hours, get back into a hobby or find a new one, reconnect with friends - do something else so for a little while, you are not thinking about your ex and your past relationship.

    I have been there and I am sure many others have too. It hurts and it sucks and reliving or rethinking about it only makes it suck more and hurt more. :(

    But eventually, it will pass. In the meantime, find something that puts some joy back into your life - go hiking, go visit a friend, do that thing that you keep putting off, etc

    Sending good thoughts your way. :)

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 9

  • He already had a woman lined up to take your place. The feelings of guilt regret hope love blah blah are normal. to have them go away is the answer you search for... listen reflect on yourself improve yourself. Speed dating helps too.

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  • Yeah it's normal. I occasionally think of mine I broke up with a year ago... with time it gets less and less though

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  • I too still think about my exes occasionally. No real problem.

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  • yes, thoughts are painful sometimes. like a pet goldfish who upped and died on you. you miss him for a while but them you pick yourself back up and recover from your loss. that's it girl, think of him as your old pet goldfish and you will be just fine.

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  • best advice I have is distract yourself by what you like to do or keep yourself busy eventually you'll stop thinking about him

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  • its because you loved him without knowing, and he tells you this to make you jealous dont fall for it play the game

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    • True. Does that mean he loved me if he's trying to make me jealous.. or that he still has feels? i showed i didn't care and he got angry then blocked me from messaging him. haven't heard from him since!😂

    • I can speak for the dude, I would say he is childish if he blocked you and he's not worth it, it will one thing after another

  • normal it goes deeper when u overthink about it

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  • very normal. I still think about exs. I had years ago

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  • It is normal to think of them every so often... but you need to move forward with your life. It is over.. accept this and move on.

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What Girls Said 11

  • Was he part of your everyday life for more than a month or two? You can't just "get over" and forget everything instantaneously. It will take time, and moving forward by making new memories. Make plans as often as you can with other people who don't know or talk to him, or his new girlfriend. Distractions!

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    • We met in 2015, got together for 5 months.. didn't talk for 6 months, got back together again for another 5 months.. then ended it 2 months ago.. we were friends, but as soon as he got with this new girl he said he still wants to talk but worried I'll fuck up his relationship. Like wtf? But i stopped contact and blocked him!(:
      dont wanna be used anymore. I've got a new job and everything too! so im happy now. Plus he was an emotionally abuser but i loved him at the time! so it was difficult tbh!

    • It was a rhetorical question; I meant that he being there became normal to you, and that's why it will take a long time to feel okay again as you redefine what normal means to you.

  • Think about what he's doing and how much you don't want to be with a guy like that. Not a perfect little scenario of what could have been. Think about what you don't want instead of what your mind thinks you need.
    My ex was super confusing about the break up, was too scared to meet with me in person, was cold to me, and blocked me on every social media outlet. Don't want someone like that.

    Otherwise it just takes time and another healthy relationship to begin.

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  • yeah it's normal 2 months ago wasn't that long ago. when you love someone it takes awhile to get over it

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    • But what i dont understand is that he sent me pictures of them two together as well? like why on earth would he do that? its wrong and a nasty thing to do!

    • yeah that's fucked up. he's trying to make you jealous don't let him get to you.

    • He still has feelings and the poor new girl is he's rebound. .. he's being childish. ... I'm damn sure he also thinks of you. .. Was the break up mutual and was the relationship bad?

  • I suggest you stay away from social media for a while. Go out and have fun! Be with friends and family. Go on a little trip. If you are ready, start dating again. Meeting or dating new guys is the way to get over him. Good luck

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  • You need the first tell him to stop telling you about his dates. That f'ing rude. I would also suggest no contact at all and get yourself busy. Work, School, friends, gym, hobbies. Whatever you can take fill your mind with other things.

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  • Dont talk to him. Past relationships haunt the best of us. I was with my ex for 8 years and unfortunately he was a big part of my life. Letting go and finding someone new will help, but they will always be a part of your past.

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  • It is totally normal, and it hasn't even been that long since the breakup so its completely normal. You have to let time do the job for you. You'll forget, when you're ready.

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  • Tell him to stop saying that he has been on a date. Some guys don't understand how women react to things. Breakups takes time. I would suggest that you should treat yourself something that makes you happy. I started training and it made me more confident. Maybe start seeing new people and start new friendships.

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  • Absolutely normal. I mean, you shared a lot of moments with him I guess so it's difficult not to think about it

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  • You probably still have feelings for him that's why you're thinking about him.

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  • yes its normal you just have to take it slowly than move on to a better and new guy

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