What should I do?

I just learned my parents are getting divorced and I don't want to tell my girlfriend about it because it's really personal but at the same time I don't want her to think that me being cold and distant is because of her. What should I do?

  • Tell her
    Vote A
  • Keep it to yourself
    Vote B
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What Girls Said 1

  • tell her when you are ready. it does that have to be immediately, but if you are serious about her, let her in to your world

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What Guys Said 1

  • How long have you been with her?
    This is the kind of stuff that is important to talk about. If this is a serious girlfriend who you love and trust, why would you hide it?
    You don't have to go into details if you're uncomfortable with that, you could just tell her that your parents aren't getting along well and it's really bothering you. Otherwise she'll do exactly what you said, she'll start to wonder why you're acting different and either think that you're up to no good, or wonder if she's somehow not making you happy. It will ultimately cause tension in the relationship and who knows where that could lead. On the other hand, if you tell her that there's stuff going on at home that has you upset, she'll be more able to understand if you're acting differently.
    You might even find it therapeutic to talk with her about what's going on and how it's making you feel, it's good to get this kind of stuff off your chest when you have someone trustworthy who cares for you and is willing to listen.

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    • Yea I have so many emotions going on right now and I don't want to go off and yell at her she means the world to me

    • If you're at the point where yelling is in the cards, you probably should either step back from the relationship until YOU get it together, or commit to the relationship for real and be willing to really open up with her and let her know what's going on.
      The more little secrets and things that you try to hide or keep her in the dark about, the less likely the relationship is to work out, you know?
      Let her in on the whole story, not necessarily the personal details of what's going on between your parents, but whatever level of detail you're comfortable with. This is something big going on in your life that is having an effect on you. If she has a better understanding of what you're dealing with right now, she'll probably behave differently with you and hopefully there won't be a need for anyone to yell. At least the odds are better... though she might be doing the same kind of thing to you, too.

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