How would you feel if your girlfriend doesn't tell you the complete truth about something?

So my girlfriend wants to take her daughter to a softball game to spend time with her.
It is her coworkers softball game
Which after interrogating her as to why she couldn't tell me she wanted to go to his game she said I get jumpy. I just think its odd that she needed me to not be around on said night and didn't tell me it was a male coworker. We've been together for 14 months and I keep catching her in stuff like this and it's always my fault, I'm insecure or smothering her, so I have changed that but am I kidding myself or is the whole insecure thing a way for her to make me feel bad when I catch her being untrustworthy? Should this be a deal breaker?


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What Girls Said 1

  • Are you actually ridiculously jealous? Was there a time when she did tell you that she's spending time with a male friend/coworker? How did you react? If there was never a time she was open with that then it's not you, it's likely all her.

    • So no I'm not perfect, I have reacted badly to a few things since we've been together, like finding out she was doing Meth, I didn't react well to that, or finding a message on her phone from a different guy asking when they were going to meet up tomorrow. But pretty much the same story throughout stuff like getting drunk with her ex husband and one of my friends, not inviting me and not telling me about it, I found out a few weeks after the fact. Giving some random guys rides home from the bar that she didn't even tell me she was going out to drink.

    • Ok, I totally get you reacting badly to finding out that she was doing Meth. It's highly addictive and extremely harmful to the body, getting upset at finding out she was doing Meth is completely reasonable.

      Okay, finding the message on her phone from a different guy asking when they're going to meet up, that one's iffy, if she hadn't done anything prior to this to make you question her, it's not completely reasonable to get upset/jealous. It is something that I do think would be nice of her to let you know, personally if I were in your shoes, I'd want her to tell me, but I also understand that some people don't like "reporting" all of their actions with the opposite sex to their partner. The thing with getting drunk with her ex, did she tell you that she met up with him? If not, that is definitely something she should have told you, I do think interactions with exes fall into the category of things you should let your partner know about.

    • If she went to the bar and drank, she also really shouldn't be driving. Now, the thing with that is, if she's just a super nice person, perhaps she's just being nice. Is she a super nice person who will go out of her way to be nice to others? (Currently I doubt she's that type of person, but you know I could be wrong, and you're the one who knows her after all) But at the same time, that's also just not a good idea because why are you giving a random stranger a ride home, what if something happens?

      Maybe she's the type of person that doesn't like telling their SO what they're doing. They dislike the feeling of "reporting" everything they're doing to someone else. Honestly, I think those types of people just aren't used to being in a relationship, being in a relationship means being a 'we' not an 'I' anymore. Personally, like I said, in your shoes I would have wanted her to tell me, for me I would feel like she's trying to still live a single life while dating me.

What Guys Said 1

  • She's fucking him. Guaranteed. Dump her now.

    Plus, you're dating a single mother. You fucked up. Single mothers are for fucking and forgetting. It's not too late to fix your mistake, though, since you haven't married her.

    Dump. Her. Now.


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