Recent Ex Being Very Weird (even his friends are confused!)

Sorry, it's a long one. My ex and I had a fantastic relationship. Minimal drama, that instant spark that carried on throughout the entire relationship. We both discussed marriage and kids, said I love you, etc. He broke up with me completely out of the blue two weeks ago, didn't tell a soul, and hasn't talked to his best friends, which is weird, because he's SUCH a talker about emotional stuff with them.

Now, granted, I could tell a little that he was getting cold feet, but we were both taking steps to give him space and not discuss the serious stuff for a while (this came about, oh, three weeks before we broke up). He acknowledged and appreciated my efforts in that department. I'm his first serious girlfriend; before me, he mostly dated casually, dated girls for a couple of weeks at a time, went out and partied, but still works two jobs, so he wears himself out easily. I've had very serious boyfriends before him.

When he broke up with me, EVERYONE was thrown off. His friends were coming to me, our mutual friends were asking me, etc. It's been two weeks, and he's been partying like crazy. Going out every night, staying out drinking until 2am, while still working both jobs. We both liked going out (separately and together) but it was maybe 2-3 times a week, and the rest of the time, we'd chill at home (again, together or separate). According to mutual friends, he's trying way too hard to act happy.

So the latest thing is jealousy, I think. I went on a disastrous date with a perfectly nice guy a month or so before I met my ex. They know each other BARELY because of work. Ex knows I went on a date with this guy. Out of the blue, I get a text at 2:30am from that guy asking why I'm talking crap about him to my boyfriend. Uh. What? Again, they're not friends, and why would this come up? I apologized, said I was no idea what I was talking about and Ex broke up with me recently.

I'm 26, he's 25 (only a couple of months younger). I think he's just freaking out about life in general because his career isn't settled and he can't move out of his parents' house because his jobs don't pay enough. He's trying to find a new one but in this economy, it's not the easiest. People keep telling me to just keep ignoring him (I have been; he contacted me a little last week, and I responded, and now I'm just like, whatever, I'm not reaching out to you at all) and he'll come around in a few weeks once this is out of his system, but... WTF is going on?!


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  • how long were you guys together, that's crucial for me to know because I think I know what he's doing

    Can I tell you this sounds exactly like my situation...i was a bit younger but I was with my ex for seven years, he just left me again two almost three weeks ago. he always leaves and comes back to me and he's done this since I met him. he's gone again, anyway, during our seven years he did exactly to me what's getting done to you. he wants to have fun right now, not be tied down and have the responsibility of a gf...believe me that's all it is. he will come back to that much...and you gotta make sure you put your foot down and not let him back so easily, my big mistake every time. don't contact him, stop talking to mutual friends about it..and he will come back. NO CONTACT. and my ex was hanging with other girls too when he left me. and we had the perfect relationship too, or so I thought lol. your ex wants to be alone right now, so give him that space. he will miss u.

    • Btw I'm 23 right now and he's 25...26 in october...i thought guys would grow up around 25, 26 haha think again!

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    • Yea nine months is long..doesnt matter because I was with my ex for less then that when he left me to do exactly what your ex is doing and he still came back. Don't contact him at all..ugh I hate when guys do this it irks me so much because I know how it feels. Let him do what he wants to do. if you take him back put your foot down for a little before you do. teach him a lesson that he cannot walk all over you- he maybe a little confused and he may be trying to figure out if its you he wants too.

    • Yeah, I know the ONLY way to get him back is to just completely ignore him and do my own thing. He fell in love with a strong, independent girl, so why would he go back to someone who begs and pleads for him to come back? I hope he just needs to get this out of his system, he's acting totally unlike himself!

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