What is my ex boyfriends deal?

My ex and I broke up less than a month ago after one year. Before we both knew it we were back to spending time together, still say we love each other, still use forms of endearment, are affectionate, etc. He said that before we even talk about us, there needs to be changes. For example, I've been looking for work and he is trying to get his finances in order and work on anger issues. This week he went away on business, and I am at his apartment watching our puppy. He said that when he gets back, we need to spend actual time apart to grow independently. I miss him so much already, and as clear as he put things I'm having a hard time coping. The only thing that helps is that he says he'll be back before I know it, and that he loves me and only wants me. He also asked what I would be doing while he was away, to which i said I'd be making positive changes. He agreed that while we were still involved, it is a given that he would not sleep with other people and still only wants me in that way. How do I stay positive and distracted while he is gone, and what can I do to get him to miss me while he is away? If he was done for good I wouldn't be watching his house right? (He trusts me)


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What Guys Said 3

  • That's actually a really good thing for the both of you. You should be really happy about this! Your boyfriend is doing the right thing. It's like this, your relationship was failing and it did fail, if you two just get back together asap, things won't change and the relationship will fail again. If the relationship is to work out you BOTH need to take a step back and have some time to think about yourselves as individuals and where in the relationship did things go wrong. You can't fix something if you don't know what the issue is and the only way to find that out is with a break like your boyfriend has initiated. He really cares about you and doesn't want to fuck things up hence why he feels the need to take a step back and better himself so this doesn't happen again. Having time and space from each other will give both of you time to reflect on why things turned sour and how to better handle things. Now you have the time to look back at your entire relationship and see things with a clearer eyes, so use that time. I would even suggest you two go completely no contact for the time he's away (it would be good if you go no contact for like a month tbh).

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  • okay well I noticed you said he wanted to spend time apart actual time apart to get used to being that way sounds more like he's having you watch his apartment take care of your puppy because he doesn't have a house sitter and he wants one if I were you I would really think hard about this because this time apart thing but does not help a relationship trust me I've done this my relationship ended shortly thereafter because she found someone else while she was having her phone time and here I sit by myself I'll tell you what that s*** really sucks so be careful don't let him use you for a house sitter or a dog Watcher there are people that get paid for that kind of stuff instead of being used for the emotions and because they love the other person make sure you don't let him play you because you don't sound like a fool to me FYI just watch your back because it sounds like somebody's going to screw you over and I'm truly sorry to tell you that but it does sound that way I've done there done that was not fun and like a fool whenever she calls me up I go running back just like a whipped puppy not good it's just my opinion

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