I have been with my husband for 12 years, married for almost 7. We have 4 children and a great relationship.
But here is the problem. I am overly extroverted; and he is introverted. He refuses to speak about problems we have, and will bottle everything up until he explodes. He has NEVER laid a finger with me, nor would I stay if ever he did. We do not have 'big' fights in front of the children, apart from the normal argument here and there. Although, when they're at school, playdates etc: and we fight. There's breaking things, throwing things, punching walls. And then it's done.
We have these big fights maybe once every 6-8 months. We barely argue. But when we do, the fights are HUGE! However, never ever physical. Then by the time the kids get home, we are fine.
It's gotten to a point where I don't even know if counselling is worth going to.
Is this relationship worth fighting for?
I love him, but I feel like I'm ready to let go and move on. Being extroverted with an introverted partner is very hard (for both of us.) I have done what I can. He refuses to acknowledge any problems we have. Yes, I am happy. But not as happy as I feel I should be, or he should be. Should I let my marriage go? Please don't judge me. I feel like we JUST tolerate each other for the children, but there is love there. But he just makes it out like there are no issues whatsoever. And for 11 years I have tried to get him to open up😫
Most Helpful Guy
his unwillingness to open up shows he refused to acknowledge your concerns which means he does not respect your feelings.. it sounds like he has a poor idea of what a relationship should be.. how is his parents relationship/marriage it sounds like he had a poor example of a marriage while he was growing up
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Most Helpful Girl
Sounds like you are living with a stonewaller. They difficult to get along with because they shut off completely.
I've read some good marriage books and even got my husband to read them too.
Dr John Gottman, seven principals for making marriage work. He has a great website.
If you can get him to marriage counseling it could help.
What you need to do is to think back, do you still have happy memories?
Or are they being over shadowed?
Okay so if something unplanned happened on your wedding day can you back and joke about it?
A negative feeling towards memories is a bad thing.