Do you fall out of love easily?

Ok so this is a weird one but I can literally lose feelings for someone in a week.
Its like I will wake up and be like "I don't want this anymore".
I thought I was so happy in my current relationship but lately I have realised how controlling and jealous he is. I have been banned from seeing certain friends and all the things I love are ridiculed.
He refuses to come and visit my house because he hates my flatmate and we have to have sex in hotels as he hasn't told his parents about us yet.
i swear I have been such a fool for him but every day he promises the moon and stars to me and I guess after a terrible prior relationship he seemed like my knight in shining armour.
I always seem to pick the people with massive issues. I'm a good person and all I ask for in a relationship is Loyalty, Trust and Love. I don't care about money.
I have woke up this morning and I cannot feel anything.
But that's when I know it's over.
Just thought I'd leave a bit of background before I came across as some heartless bitch.
Just really would like to know if anyone can go from "I love this person" to "ugh you suck" over night. It's like I have an off switch.
Id really like to hear from anyone who has experienced the same instant loss of feelings and what the reasons for it was.
Thank you in advance to all who respond.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Its definitely possible. If you feel that your not satisfied, itll start to creep up. It won't hit you til you hard til you understand the reasoning. I had this experience before when my ex just takes too much energy to be around. Id avoid her at all cost but i still loved her. I started being distant. Then i see that i just stoped liking her.

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    • That's exactly it. Thank you.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Not particularly for a boyfriend, but yes for crushes and guys I dated shortly.

    It happened two times this year. First it was guy who seemed like a perfect boyfriend material. We dated for couple of months and in all honesty, he did more for me then my ex did during our whole four year old relationship. This guy was there for me when I lost my job, he moved earth and heaven to find me another job. He was always checking up on me and always made sure I'm not sitting at home depressed. He would take me to fun places and shower me with attention and compliments. He even offered to pay for my rent (because I lost my job). I was so amazed by him and gradually I really fell in love with him. Then my birthday came and I invited him to come for a cake. He wished me a happy birthday and said he'll come by later. Not only did he not come later, he didn't even contact me to tell me he's not gonna make it. I ended up really sad for my birthday and just like that... I lost interest in him. He called me couple of days later to apologize but I just didn't feel anything for him anymore. He wasn't even bothered by it. I ended things with him without a second thought and never thought about him again.

    The second time with another guy was this weekend actually. I started recently seeing a guy that I really, really liked, I even fell in love with him on the first date, it's crazy. I was head over heels for him. He treated me amazing for a week and then when we made plans to watch a movie at my place this weekend, he didn't contact me at all. I finally texted him yesterday and he said that these days he's just not in a really crappy mood. That he didn't got out of his house the whole weekend that he just played video games, that he doesn't have a will to live how bad his mood is. And there we go... interest gone, in a second, poof! He apologized and promised me we'll see a movie soon and I was like yeah sure no problem, but it's not gonna happen, I don't like him anymore, fuck it.

    I wish I wasn't that strict when it comes to guys and their flakiness, I wish I didn't care and just used them to have fun when they're up to, but I can't. One mistake and I'm gone.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 8

  • This would sound heartless if the relationships you were in were good, but this just sounds like you're more prone to moments of clarity

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    • Wow. Good answer, thank you.

  • I don't love to begin with like sure anyway im loyal as hell so i try to stick it out and work it out but once you lie to me its pretty much a deal breaker i won't trust you and probably just keep you around to manipulate you if you are in some way beneficial to me

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  • I normally would say the time it takes to get into a relationship, it can end just as quick... Ofcourse thats just what i tell myself. But really i'd say your situation has it's ups and downs. Easier to recognize a bad situation and get out but knowing when to try and work it out vs just heading out...

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  • Depending on the situation if your the one doing the dumping then yes , but you will find that little things like adverts or something you do will always trigger a good. memory or a bad one linking you to that person

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  • Yeah, I'm not big on feelings anyway so i can fall out of of love bloody fast

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  • u wanna dump this man? where r ya frm? United states? its common for a westner to do dat

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    • LOL Is that right? Oh you know because westerners are incapable of being in love for the long term. Is that it? Get out of here

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    • *Yawn* I think you are struggling hard to comprehend basic issues

    • woww!! hatss off to your knowledge... about a country.. luks like u were the weakest student in your class.. who didn't know the heck about general knowledge.. who stayss in dis world but dosent know wats happening around.. its not a country of snake charmers.. its a country of mousee charmers which has snatched a lot of jobs in your country.. hahahaha and your companies like idiots continue to give jobs to us!

  • Not anymore

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  • After a breakup.. sure.. immediately.

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What Girls Said 10

  • Because you know you're worth. It is a sign of intelligence which you will be hated and criticized for, both by men and women so get ready. I am the same, I never stayed with anyone that treated me less than I deserve. No one with half a brain will stick around another human being they didn't even know most of their lives, and allow that person to wreck them unless they have serious issues, nothing is wrong with you. The right person will make you want to stay, but in today it seems hopeless as people refuse to work on themselves but rather mask it with criticism of those who oppose their lifestyle ideologies. You are likely to meet more insecure, controlling boys, rather than men so buckle up honey. Find a hobby or career to focus on rather than stress over someone's child.

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  • Well if you are treated badly it is possible and makes sense. You reach a point where you have enough. However if you are a really good happy relationship it would seem odd and I would question how deep your feelings could be if it is so easy to let go. I love deeply and strongly so I can't get over a serious love over a week.

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    • Fair point. Thank you for your opinion.

  • Ok wait a minute. You are 30-35 and dating someone that lives with his parents? What are you thinking? Not only isn't he stable enough for a relationship, he's not even good to you. Are you sure he lives with his parents and not another woman? I would find out. Either way it would be a deal breaker for me

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  • Same experiences here but I never jumped into a relationship or acted on attractikn with anyone really because I knew how easily I lost interest and it wasn't worth it. Till I met this amazing guy, that was so compatible with me it was almost creepy lol and I just knew deep inside I couldn't let him go, haven't regretted it one bit and he still keeps me entertained after a year and half. I don't see it changing either. But I was really cautious checking for red flags and got to know him really well before making a choice.

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  • Yes but I lose it in an instant. Like I can say I love you and end things automatically. I've learned to shut that feeling down because it is tooken advantage of by anyone. With my current relationship same thing I could end things rn but I love him to death. I just don't find meaning behind most words half the time when I say things. My head is completely empty most of the time.

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  • you need to tell him "I feel """"""""""""""""""""" when you do this or that"
    and you need to tell him that you need him to change this or that to make you more happier or else you can't see him anymore.

    he has to think of your happiness too not just his.

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  • No, I don't, although a lot of times I wish I did... or maybe just turn off my feelings/emotions completely and at will.

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  • that's the thing about relationships, one person can wake up and decide its over. you really gotta be on the same page as your partner at all times.

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  • its not you honey. when someone has been sabotaging your every move and when they make you feel bad and hurt, its natural to develop sone hate for then. after that you just keep trying to love then because you had fun in the starting of the relationship. but we know deep dowb we dont love them anymore but we still keep trying and then one day we give up the trying and this happens

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  • it is really hard for me to fall for someone that's why i am single

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