What kind of relationship is this? Help would be great.

So I dated this girl a couple years back, it wasn't very successful as we were both pretty young and immature, but we remained very close friends and talked often. Then she dated this other guy and had a long relationship but during it she always flirted with me, when they broke up the flirting got heavier, but she often flirts with other guys in the same way but she always seems to come back to me. Then she moved and I didn't see her much, we still talked often though. After about 6 months she came back and went to a different school, for a period of about 2 months we texted everyday and would have sexual conversations, telling each other our fantasies and things, unfortunately we rarely saw each other then she just kind of suddenly stopped texting me and she dated a few other guys and we drifted apart until the start of this year when the same 'special treatment' presented itself again. At the moment though she is quote "just talking" to the original guy with whom she had a long relationship and they have been fighting, then last night we were at a friends, about 6 of us, and for hours we were on the couch, her legs across mine and kind of cuddling and we were getting really close and I thought maybe something was going to happen as it just seemed then as if we were a couple, then we watched a horror movie and my wussy friend was getting scared, so she sat next to him and held his hand all the while burying her feet in my crotch, then she fell asleep in his lap. What the hell do I mean to her? Thanks for bothering to read.

PS: by flirting I mean the standard stuff and sitting on my lap, touching, cuddling, spooning, second base and sticking her tongue out for a couple of seconds and making sure I see it. Its a unique style, I'll say that.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • As others have said she is kind of using you at her convenience, which depending on what you really want could be bad for you. Considering how you talked about her flirting with you at the end etc.. tbh I think the only way to tell is to make a move, but from what you said it doesn't seem to me that she wants more, she may just enjoy the attention you give her.

    I think she's using you as a sort of a stop-gap between actual relationships, and therefore is not looking for anything with you. Of course you could ask her, but I understand that can be a bit awkward, if I were you I'd make a move next time your alone, and gauge her reaction.

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    • Thanks man, I think I will just make a move, sort this out once and for all.

    • Don't mention it, good luck

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What Girls Said 2

  • Well I would say that she cares for you a lot and maybe wants to be together but might be afraid that's its going to end the same as the last time. I think she will eventually come around and tell you the truth, or you could tell her how you feel and see where it goes from there. You will just have to give it a try.

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  • She sounds like she's useing you a lttle bit, YOu should tell her, she cnt just dip in and out of your life, she should make a choice either be a friend and just that, or be more. But its not fair because she soounds kinda slutty, giving mixed messages to most of the guys. Straight up ask her what's going on. x

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What Guys Said 1

  • You are on the wrong end of this deal. She engages with you when it's convenient for her.

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