Found underwear in his car that weren't mine, broke up with me because he felt like I "didn't trust him", did I deserve to get dumped?

A few days ago, we were going on a date but last minute he decided to bring his grandma which bothered me because we hadn't gone on a date in a while.
When I open the back door of his car to sit, I found underwear that wasn't mine on the seat and asked him whose underwear it was. He explained that the lady who usually takes care of his grandma or his mom gave them to him because it wasn't his moms nor sisters so he assumed they were mine. We were together for 3 years and 8 months so in my opinion he should know what my underwear looks like in the first place, any time I get a new pair I show him. I was in disbelief and I was confused because even if the story might be true, where did they come from? He didn't even text me saying he was bringing "my underwear" anyways. He was the one who ended up breaking up with me and now he wants me back but I'm hurt that he left me. I've put so much time and effort into this relationship and sometimes it feels like he hasn't, We also have his mom who controls his life even though he's 21, I already have my own apartment and I'm 20, but he didn't have a job so I wasn't going to let him leech off of me. His mom wants to keep him forever, I guess that's why she hates me. I already told him I need my space and stuff. Was the was I reacted not reasonable? Did I "deserve" getting dumped? I trust him but it's just the story doesn't add up...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Story is a lie. You didn't deserve to get dumped. Just him spinning the story and he believes in his delusional mind you don't trust him. I wouldn't take him back to be honest. Not just for this whole fiasco but he seems kinda like a momma's boy loser.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I think he maufactured the underwear situation as an excuse to break up with you. Whether he was hoping the underwear owner was a better prospect than you, or his mother was nagging him to finish with you, is a guess on my part.
    He's not worth your trust at this stage, or worth being with. He's manipulative and being manipulated.

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  • sounds like he's a scumbag

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What Girls Said 3

  • If this underwear thing really was nothing as he says, then I doubt he would have escalated the situation by breaking up over it.

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  • You found UNDERWEAR in his CAR lol.
    TBH I have a hard time believing that story. And if it were his sisters or moms, why wouldn't he get it out of his car asap? When I got my sister underwear mixed up in my laundry I got that out. of my room immediately lmfao.
    TBH that's just weird af to me.

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  • The fact that he made such a big deal out of you finding the underwear and questioning him shows he is guilty, if he didn't cheat and the story were true he would have been chilled and calm but clearly there is more to the story than he is saying, i dont think there is an excuse for that any way he got caught and you deserve better seems like a asshole

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