After break up, my ex boyfriend said mean things to me. Does he mean them? Does he not really care anymore? Is he still thinking of me?

A month ago, my ex broke it off with me after he got fired from our company. We were together for 9 months and we were good but had problems as well. The day he got fired was the day he dumped me through a text. I asked to meet up with him two days later and he was all over me making out and stuff but I pushed him off because I told him we are no longer together and he got mad. He said hurtful things to me and told me he did not regret breaking up with me so I blocked him on everything. Days later, I unblocked him and he was begging me to talk to him and he said I made him see a therapist because he is not doing well since I blocked him. For days, we were good, he was talking nice to me and begging me to be his friend. He told me he has a big exam coming and he is preparing for it. He was initiating contact everyday, calling me but never wanted to ask to meet up. Although agrees to see me when I asked. But we only met up one time. But he said, he never asks to see me because it hurts when I push him away. Our conversations are light and flirty but we end up arguing when we talk about the past. He told me not to message him anymore if we are gonna end up fighting. He told me he cares about me, and it matters if we talk everyday. But I have been cutting short our conversations knowing he is not mine anymore. He noticed that and he started getting mad at me saying the next day, we don't really have to talk anymore and that I make him not wanna talk to me and he has very low tolerance of me especially he's going nuts over this big upcoming exam which will make or break his future. He even said haven't we done a lot of talking? So I replied ok and never pushed further. That night, he still managed to text me goodnight. Since then, I never replied or talked to him anymore. And he hasn't contacted me either. It's been 6 days since.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Guy got fired, he's going through some shit and you are feeding his crazy.
    I'd be sorry for him if I was that kind of guy.

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    • Him getting fired actually was a relief for him he said because he will actually focus full time on his school and exam. Should I text him ask him how's his exam doing? Or just let it be. I still love him and I wonder if he meant what he said to me. I want to be there for him but not now that my feelings are still raw. Thanks for your answer.

    • Most things said in anger are not meant. They are just said.
      Still I say leave him alone. He dumped you, time to move on.

Most Helpful Girl

  • generally, as I've found, guys appreciate their space just as much (if not more) than us women do when we're dealing with personal losses (his job in this case). he probably needs to feel like he has someone who will listen to him and show him some affection while he's trying to deal with confusing feelings. saying that however, guys are generally pretty obvious about what they want, so if he broke up with you don't think him using you for casual chat and occasional affection means anything more than that. he's still just using you at this point.

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    • so are you saying, he is over me? and I should let him go.

    • Sorry, but I'd say so.

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What Guys Said 2

What Girls Said 2

  • Yeah it's called: trying to have your cake and eat it too. I see this happen a lot. Someone will preemptively end a relationship and but refuse to let go of the "benefits." They want the lack of commitment with all of the perks: the attention, the physicality - when you take that away they get mad and lash out, because they want you to want them still and to play into their hands.

    It's selfishness, that's what it is.

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  • True colours always come out when your dumped
    9 months playing the nice guy then your dumped then it gets nasty...

    Words live on forever... be gone from his life, change your number so you aren't waiting on him call or messaging, delete Facebook apps everything... work on getting your life back

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    • thank you! i am working on it

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