Ex-boyfriend from high school is driving past my house. What do I do?

About 4 years ago, when I was a sophomore in high school, I dated a guy named "David." David and I had an on and off relationship for about a year and he constantly cheated on me until he left me for another girl. The relationship was generally pretty rough and he was the one to permanently end the relationship.
Today, I'm in a very good place and I've been in an awesome relationship with a guy who treats me right. About 4(?) months into my new relationship, a lot of weird things happened. It started with my ex friend requesting me on Facebook... then it escalated to him trying to hack into me and my boyfriends iCloud accounts and emails. My boyfriend and I have a good feeling that it's my ex trying to hack in because he's really into computers and the idea of hacking. Plus, all of my friends who knew him think the same thing as well. Now, my ex has been driving by house frequently in the morning (even though he has a new girlfriend). I haven't personally seen him drive by because I have classes early in the morning but my parents constantly see him when they leave for work at around 9am. He also tries to wear hats to hide himself because he thinks that he's so slick haha.
Anyways, what is the best thing to do? Should I just log times and dates he's stalking and hope for the best? And should I try to figure out if he's doing this to his other exs? I really don't know what to do and I'm scared that he might hurt me somehow. Sorry if this was super long. Thanks!!


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What Guys Said 1

  • Documentation is good. I'm assuming he is > 18 years old. I would nip this in the bud. Tell him very directly, in person or over the phone. "Your behavior is not OK. It's upsetting to me and my family. You are not to come around my house again. I'm telling you this now, but my next phone call will not be to you. It will be to the police".

    Keep it super short like that. Don't get into an argument. And make sure you follow up with a police report if his behavior doesn't change.

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    • Thank you this is very helpful! And yes, he is 20 going on 21 soon. I think I will make the phone call, but I am incredibly nervous. And to file a police report for stalking/harassment, do you know if there is any evidence that needs to be provided to do so? Like a log of times and dates he's driven by?

    • Write out a script that you can just read to him over the phone. That way if you get flustered, you don't have to remember what to say; just read. If you can have your Dad or someone there to support you, it might make you feel more confident. Again, keep the call very short.

      Regarding documentation, anything is helpful. Handwritten logs/notes, your cell phone statements, photograph of him and his vehicle. All of this could go into the report.

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