Why break up with a girl who treated you right?

I dated this guy for little over 5 months. I am 24 and he is 29.
He would have at least 4 beers on his way home and them have a few more once he got home. He did this mon-thurs. Come Friday morning, he would make himself a mixy right away at either 7 or 8 AM. it didn't bother me at first because it was his weekend. He'd drink a couple mixy and then passout. Wake up 2 hours later, eat something, drink again and then pass out.
After the first month, I noticed how much of a prick he would get. Everything I said or even didn't day anything at all he would get upset with me. He had "kicked me out" several times, but I never left because he was drunk when he said it and he forgot about it anyways the next morning. If I brought everything he said or did the next morning, the only response I get would be "well don't piss me off then." I have been told to "get fucked" "get the fuck out of my house" He has said 1 threat to me that he isn't afraid to hit a girl if they pissed him off enough.
There has been several times where he would be drunk and get on his motorcycle and take off for an hour. Then he would always come back and just passout. Whenever he wakes up, he gets all cuddly and acts like nothing happened.
I let the drunk him beat me up emotionally and let all of those feelings bottle up inside me. I stressed drank one night and everything came out. I apologized and he was forgiving because he said he deserved it. He slowed down for about 2 weeks and then for some reason he picked back up again. I stressed drank again and blew up and he broke up with me. We were both drunk and once again, he took off on the bike, came back and passed out.
He knows he hurts people and he doesn't seem to care. He told me he didn't want to be in a serious relationship. Hated the fact of how much he was starting to like me. He obviously was not happy for awhile and maybe that is why he broke up with me? Why break up with a girl who treated you right?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I read through the whole thing and I'm going to give you my honest opinion which you may not like. This man really doesn't give two sh*ts about you. His behavior is clearly abusive and it seems like you keep going back to it and permitting it. From what you have described here, he is showing several signs of a possible personality disorder as well. The fact that you keep staying with him and allowing this behavior is signaling to him that he can keep treating you terribly. If this continues, his behavior will never change, it's actually very likely to get worse, and you are going to keep being stuck in an emotional mindf*ck as long as you keep him in your life. Treating someone right isn't going to guarantee someone will stay with you. In fact, guys like this pick girls in your position because they know they can keep getting away with it. Your his option, not his priority, which means you will never be mutually respected. People who really respect and appreciate you treating them right won't act like this to you in a relationship, they will reciprocate and communicate healthy love and boundaries and never resort to physical violence no matter how angry they get. Any guy who says he doesn't want a serious relationship, believe them because it usually means they're not going to take you seriously! He has shown you every sign that he doesn't care about you, actions say a lot more than words. Why do you want to stay in a relationship with him? ask yourself, why do you like this guy and why do you want him to stay? analyze your answers and really check you thinking there.

    My advice would be to stay out of that relationship, or lack thereof. Walk away and never look back. Guys like this will keep giving you false apologies to keep strung along, they'll never respect you and slowly damage your self worth, and they know you'll keep letting them in unless you finally put a serious stop to it. And believe me, they usually ALWAYS come back trying to suck you back in once you're gone. Well show this guy you're not going to BS anymore, because you deserve better. No human being deserves to be treated like this. I seriously recommend you get some counseling help to heal though this process as well, because this situation is only going to get worse if you keep staying in contact with him. The only way to rid these deeply toxic people from your life is to cut them out entirely.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 6

  • Why question this? You were in a relationship with an abusive alcoholic. Good thing your out. Realize that and move on.

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  • Get out and run! Count your blessing! Alcoholic relationship not worthy of your time. Maybe friendship but even that have its limits,,,

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  • he's an alcoholic to say the least

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  • Uh, because humans are polyamorous animals and for some reason society says: "Be with one person forever."

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  • spunds like a guy that dpesnt love or is shallow

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  • You are better off without him, he is an alcoholic, find yourself a decent guy

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What Girls Said 3

  • There are several reasons why someone would initiate a breakup. It's not like simply treating your partner well is all it takes for a relationship to be successful. In your case, he could've broken up with you because:
    -your guys' desired lifestyles were too different
    -he never actually cared for you
    -he's an alcoholic who needs to focus on his own mental health issues before dragging someone else into the mix

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  • He sounds like his life is a mess because of his addiction, and he can't handle a relationship. Like others said, you're going to be much better off being single. Don't try to analyze the breakup too much, look forward not back.

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  • My personal experience is guys don't want a good behaving girlfriend to them it's boring. I used to be such a bitch and I would have to bat guys away with a pole.

    And now I am nice, I buy my own stuff buy them presents and they are not happy. Guys just want bitchy girlfriend who are high maintaince. I need to find a guy who likes and loves me for who I am and respects me to like me how I am. Calm, loving and NOT high maintenance

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