Ways to get over heart break - Crying?

I got dumped about 5 weeks ago and the girl jumped right in another relationship with someone else.

I have been trying to act as tough as I can. I have told very few people about this. I have been emotionally distant and aloof more than usual. It's been impossible for me to smile.

When she dumped me I did bring up an emotional issue at one point during our conversation (we were face to face). I almost broke down but I stayed tough. She mentioned that "although I do a lot of tough guy things...but you really sensitive". The last thing I wanted was to appear more sensitive because I TRULY believe that is one the reasons she lost interest in me. Sensitive men are NOT attractive they are NOT masculine.

Well there have been a few times where I almost broke down by myself due to the crushing loneliness I'm feeling. I toughened up and kept going.

However I am wondering if I do cry...would it help me feel better?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Cry, let it out, and you will heal what is broken inside of you.

    Feeling pain from a broken heart is not being "sensitive" it's being human. What your ex-girlfriend wants is a robot so all the emotional attention will remain hers. She was being selfish - she didn't want the responsibility of hurting you by making you feel you don't have the right to be emotional. If you think it was your sensitivity that pushed her away, you're wrong. It's the fact that she feels entitled to be the only one who can have feelings that made her lose interest in you. Being a man does not mean you can't feel. As a matter of fact to me a real man is one who can show emotion, who has the strength to be true to himself and his own emotions.

    It's a crock of sh*t when people assume that a man shouldn't show emotion - that's just a woman's way of remaining the focus of a relationship.

    Just let it out, in private if you have to. Allowing yourself to cry is allowing yourself to acknowledge that you were hurt, that the pain was real and that you are mourning something that you lost. Nothing unmanly about that - it is so very human. You are a man who was hurt - that's all there is to it.

    Good luck.


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What Girls Said 4

  • First, I would like to point out that I went through the same exact thing that you're going through right now.

    My ex had broken up with me. I was distraught. All I could think about was him. And before I knew it, he jumped into another relationship.

    I cried. I cried hard. I cried for a long time. I cried until my body just couldn't produce anymore tears. But let me tell you that I felt extremely better after crying. The girls who answered this before me were right. Crying releases some type of hormone that can literally calm you down.

    She might have lost interest in you...but don't just point it to that one thing; Sensitivity.

    Maybe she just wanted more or less out of a relationship. Just don't blame it on you because you don't even know if it's about you.

    I completely adore sensitive men. And it's perfectly acceptable to admit that. Any woman who thinks otherwise is wrong.

    But really the only thing you can do is keep moving forward even though you want to take a couple of steps back and try to fix whatever you think caused the break up. As much as I hate the word time, it actually comes to good use in a situation like this. Time heals everything. And it's on your side. It's been 4 months since my break up and I'm doing fantastic. But that just happened a couple of weeks ago. So you're on the right track. Just keep your head up and you'll do fine. Maybe you'll meet someone better. No, you will! You lose someone, you gain someone better. Remember that.

  • Crying always makes me feel better. There have been scientific studies on how crying actually releases endorphins(feel-good hormones)...

    Sensitive men are attractive.

  • Your ex is stupid for leaving for you.

  • yes...i read somewhere that crying releases toxins from your body..so physically you might feel a little better. but emotionally it will take time to heal.just try to occupy yourself.hang out with friends, get a hobby, focus on work just do not think about that chick.eventually you will think about her less and less until you find yourself finally happy again and ready to move on to the next special lady.


What Guys Said 3

  • Do what ever feels the best for you to get over the break up, it my not be "masculine" to cry but real men cry those people who say otherwise are usually emotionally distraught themselves and have a bunch of issues because there fathers never told them they loved them

  • exactly the same happened to me

    Drank all night, and when I woke up I regretted that.

    How to feel better?

    Be like a machine, have no feelings a while ( they only bring pain anyway )

    Try improving yourself this time, do gym, learn, start a bussiness, do anything you want but do something

  • K linguine ( that was supposed to make you smile) LOL , Okay number 1, she was seeing him while you guys were together. She was kissing him and touching him and doing watever with him while you guys were together, you need to remeber that. I think once you take that in, you head will stop spinning.

    Number 2, go out, I know you don't want too, and you just feel like loafting around, but you need to go out, go to places youve never been before, aka a a new mall in your area, or a new bowling alley, or a new club/lounge. Trust me at first you'll say why am I here, but after that ull feel better. You'll notice girls looking at you.

    If you need anything else msg me. My ex did this to me, and I was with her for a very long long time.

    • Yeah the bitch turned her head when I tried to give her a going away kiss. This was after she confirmed a relationship with him (I saw this on facebook) but still.

      I knew she was talking to other guys when I was dating her, but I was talking to other girls too. I figured that we would both do our own thing but eventually confirm a relationship together. Instead she jumps into a relationship with a guy she only met a few weeks earlier.

    • But I can play that game too k linguine...haha. Thanks for your advice bro. I have been feeling a lot better in the past couple days. I think the "no contact" phase has gotten over the hardest part.

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