We're "on a break". What should I do?

Long story short, my boyfriend and I had a huge fight last night after I told him that I have been looking at his social media and that I could not trust him yet (I have been cheated on before by my ex).

He got really mad and told me that we can't go on like this if I didn't learn to trust in him... and so we should temporarily not contact each other for a few weeks because he needs some space to think this through. He kept stressing that this is temporary... but he immediately disconnects from me through social media (unfriending on fb, insta and snapchat).

What should I do now? Should I treat this as a "break" or a "break up"?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I personally don't believe in "breaks" at all, if someone says that, to me, it's over, but that's just me. He does have a point though. You have a right to your feelings about trust and it's understandable, but every relationship is different so you can't go into it believing that you can't trust him. ie, leave the past in the past. Give him the benefit of the doubt and basic level of trust, until or unless he gives you a reason not to.

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    • But to go looking for it and reasons NOT to trust him, this is only going to hurt your relationship and stop it from happening... as you're finding out now.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 19

  • if the verbal communication is a long time problem then what is the point of dragging the both you in something that isn't as rewarding of an experience as it should be?

    you have had issues in the past causing the insecurities.
    I don't what he has had in the past, but whatever , if any, its has made him be hostile towards someone for their issues rather than being understanding and making sure that they feel safe.

    if even if it isn't a break up, break up
    that better for the both of you

    you'll get time to work on yourself and be a stronger and more confident person the next time

    I have worked on/with people with all sorts of insecurities who have managed to emerge stronger, that being said with the right exposure, you'll get over it soon too 😊

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    • Thank you!!! :)

    • anytime 😊

    • also if you ever need someone to talk to, rant, vent , share your problems or just keep company, feel free to let me know 😊

  • I would take this time and really think about what happened. Are you being overly jealous? Is it unwarranted? If so I would try and think about what you might want to do different if you guys get back to together or with anyone in the future. Jealousy is a huge turn off. So if you don't trust him then stay on the break... but realize and ask yourself.. do you not trust him because he can't be trusted because of his actions? Or Is it you that needs to realize that you have trust issues?

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    • Yes I fully agree to this. Thank you!

  • The idea of a "break" to me is absolutely stupid. You really think you're going to fix anything by ignoring the issue? People (millennials mostly) need to learn how to communicate with each other and work out the problem. Otherwise, I don't think they actually care for each other, so I'd say, regardless you should just move on. He obviously doesn't have the communication skills to be in a relationship nor had the drive to to even try to build upon your relationship and trust...

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    • amen brother
      thats exactly what I was thinking of saying 🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌

    • Thank you for saying that. But the truth is, we have been fighting over this trust issue a lot of times before... So it seemed like verbal communication could not fix our problem? :(

    • Well fighting isn't really a good communication.. You both have things to work out it seems, but being away and not working on it won't help anything..

  • you know what my ex did when we were technically on one of these " breaks" .. before i could even agree or disagree she jumped into bed with another bloke.. i ended our relationship moment she told me so in my opinion youve all ready broken up

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  • As a break. Me and my girlfriend had the same problem. We had a misunderstanding and she took a break from me. Just occupy yourself with something to do. Read, go outside, play games, etc.

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    • may I ask how long is the break usually? He said that he will get back to contacting me in around 2 weeks, do you think that this is unusual or too long?

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    • Okay! Thanks :((

    • You're welcome, it's not so good but that's the truth.

  • yeah, y'all are done. finished. no longer hot and heavy. dumped, over, broken up. What I'm trying to say is that you are not a couple any more and you should move on.

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  • He put you on the shelf so he could see if he could hook up with another woman. If he can't in those weeks he will pull you off the shelf dust you off and find some middle ground.

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  • Have a kitkat lol
    jk 😂😂

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  • watch that Friends episode.

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  • A break up. You should treat it as a permanent break up.

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  • there's no such thing as a break. you're broken up

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  • this break is him going through all of his flings without you knowing. basically he is hoe'n without you know'n

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  • Short answer: It's done I guess

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  • Break up

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  • break up

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  • call me

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  • Break up

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  • this is definitely breakup...

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  • treat it as a break up... proves you guys cannot commit in a relationship.

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What Girls Said 6

  • Breaks in relationships are usually signs that you guys won't make it. If he can go weeks without you just like that, boy bye lol.

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  • if he really cared for you, I don't think he would've reacted the way he did. yes, he can be frustrated, but he's the one that did the cheating. if a guy really cares about you, they'll do anything to earn your love and trust, and that is not what he did. sounds like he used "time" and "space" as an excuse to finish up any flings without have a girlfriend around to find out and get mad. he sounds like he's not ready for a real relationship, and I know that hurts, but everyone deserves to be loved. find someone who will treat you the way you deserve to be loved.

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    • Thank you. He didn't cheat on me... my ex did. I think my trust issue bothers him a lot

  • Personally I don't do breaks. They confuse me and I'm into simple stuff. So I'd just treat it as a break up.

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  • he's right, you have to trust him. Consider it a break not a break up.

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  • Since you were on a break, he probably slept with the hot girl at the copy shop last night... Apparently this happens all the time when you're on a break! Don't believe me? Ask Rachel Green!

    Here something to cheer you up :
    All you want is a dinkle
    What you envy's a schwang
    A thing through which you can tinkle
    To play with or simply let hang

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  • Date someone else! Take advantage of your freedom

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