Will the feeling ever go away? PLEASE READ DESCRIPTION BEFORE ANSWERING?

After a long and painful 3 years on and off relationship, I finally ended it with my ex. It hurt but I will not be letting him back into my life again.
I just wanted to collect some answers in the hope I would feel better. I know guys will answer this and get funny about how I feel, but I ask that you answer honestly according to what you believe about your gender.
My ex would always like (not so much facebook) girls instagram selfies. This is both provocative and plain selfies. Most of them are edited and you can tell, but some are natural. Part of the reason I left him was because he wouldn't stop when I begged him to, due to how anxious and undervalued it
made me feel. I hoped after leaving I would stop having the urge to stop looking... but it hasn't worked.
I still look on some of the girls account because I have the push to. I don't know why, I can't stand him anymore because of the other reasons we broke up, but I just don't know why I feel the urge to look and see what he's liked?
Does anyone have any advice on how to stop or at least how long it will be till I stop wanting to look?
I don't wanna delete instagram because I have it for my own personal use, and I have blocked the girls, but I still feel the urge to go digging and it really sucks.

  • Once you get over him you won't want to do it anymore
    Vote A
  • You're always gonna want to look
    Vote B
  • Other (please elaborate)
    Vote C
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
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Most Helpful Guy

  • it will go away when you both want it to go away and let it go away. everything we do is for a reason and always more then one reason goes into our decisions even if we don't realize at the time... you don't want to stop looking at heart cause you have hope you are gonna look one day and find out he ain't liking their stuff anymore... you don't let it go away because you loved him and don't know if you will ever find love like that again. And hell I don't know for sure but I don't think you will find love like that again... but that's because loving someone for the same reasons and ways you loved him would be loving him. you will love others just as much probably more but it will be for different reasons. I think it's messed up when people can't work because of social media and well other people in general because no matter the temptations around a relationship all that should matter is no matter how much flirting or looking or whatever goes on every second a person's heart should be with the one they love and the one they love have this heart so they should feel that and know nothing can mess up what is real... however love is this complicated hurtful hard to do shit. this idea of things working cause it's real, ain't no rule. do yea your desire might go away might not depends on you but only you can make it go away... good luck hope I helped a little

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Most Helpful Girl

  • First of all, you had every right to end things with him x I mean how hard is it to stop tapping a picture right? Especially if your girl is upset about it. The urge will definitely fade, literally take one full day off instagram or if you go on fight the urge to look at the likes xx. The first day is the hardest, from there it's easy. You're stronger than you think. Remember there's always a guy out there who will treat you better and an extra inch 😉 Haha. Judging from your profile picture you're beautiful, so I assume many guys would love to take you out on a date, just try and forget him, start things with someone worth your time

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 9

  • You obviously did the right thing.
    How could you stay with someone who likes pictures on social media.. even after three years, it'd be straight up ridiculous.
    Assuming that you would have built up any kind of faith or trust in your now ex boyfriend's intentions within all that time, also seems completely weird to me.
    All in all, there is nothing more important than social media, so breaking up over that reason, blocking all the girls involved in that and still looking at their accounts is perfectly reasonable.
    Seriously though.. there must have been a ton of things wrong within your relationship.. otherwise you wouldn't have reacted that way.
    I believe you'll get over it.. 3 years is a long time, so of course it will be hard at first.
    If you want to stop looking at the girls' accounts then just take a break from social media in general.. you seem to have a problem with that anyway, as you value it way more than it is worth and take things on there far too seriously.

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  • It'll be hard. Hope I understood your point of looking at the girls he's looking at.

    You may "hate" him but hate is not the opposite of love, apathy is. Sounds like you really loved him. You my always love him but not be in love with him. Tim to move forward and do what's best for you and put yourself in a good place for a positive relationship.

    The more you do this the harder it will be... take a break from the apps and replace with better options until you get a handle on it.

    Good luck an I I feel your pain. Similar story only a girl broke my heart... i'm married now. We don't talk about it. Our marriage Is about us and not our pasts... we both wish others the best but bottom line they aren't thinking bout us why waste our time and harm our happiness?

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  • Your breakup was right.
    If he doesn't respect you enough to do that it's his own fault. Looking at your avatar you're pretty cute so he's nuts to act like that.
    I'm sure like you said there were other things too.

    I'll put it like this.
    I check in on my exes every so often, some more than others.
    The bigger the heartbreak the more often I check. I check on ALL OF THEM randomly.
    If the breakup was sour you might do this a lot at first until you finally see something that hurts you. Then you might stop.
    Otherwise you may do this occasionally for awhile.
    Some people don't do this but I don't go out telling people I do this either in a normal talk.

    Good luck and if you are strong enough just block them and focus on yourself.

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  • three years is a long time and u will need a long time to get over him and the more u spend time with others the more u get away from him so don't be alone and try to mingle with others just to take u mind off it

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  • It'll be a long and hard road, but understand that they have been part of your life for 3 years. It's hard to forget about someone especially if they've been an integral part of your life. Eventually though you'll slowly fill that void and you'll get over it. Take things day by day, hope you feel better and for what it's worth you have beautiful eyes! Have a great day.

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  • 3 years is a really long time and in that time you learned to value his opinion so you just want to know what type of girl he likes because you are getting over him and thats natural once you realize that his opinions dont matter to you will stop looking at the posts.

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  • just find something entertaining to do.

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  • Yeah. I've just answered without reading anything.

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  • Yeah ummmm

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What Girls Said 3

  • in 3of my relationships , once they ended , I prayed for the day I wouldn't think about them anymore , it's a tough road , nothing easy about it... but the best way for it to happen sooner is to just stick to the separation and maintain your goal achievement... the day will finally come and Ull only be able to laugh and smile at Urself in the mirror and tell ur self it's the best day of Ur fukin life !😀😘 and it honestly will be...

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    • u really just have to accept the journey that has to be taken to gain strength... this particular step of being in a relationship is the hardest step and is the reason why most don't want relationships anymore because of the chance it not working out and the miserable days of letting go

  • It'll take time. Best you can do is limit the use of instagram for a while. And if you're on and feel the urge to look, get off it.
    It'll only hurt you more and make it more difficult to move on

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  • once you get over him you won't feel anything for him anymore, he will be just a stranger for u

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