Cheats after 30 years?

If for three years you waited and took care of the kids and had sex every time you could when they were home. slot of oral, his favorite. also never went out when he was gone. would you cheat on a woman like that because she became sick? he told a girl he had a crush on her and she sent him nude photos. should I believe that there is more I'm not being told?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • i would at least he's masturbating to them more than likely I'm not saying I'm going to cheat we might have a discussion if that's what it call for according to the illness and if I had a been a good husband and she had been a good wife I'm hoping that we could have a trustworthy and intelligent conversation and she would understand where I'm coming from and love me enough to understand what I was saying I'm saying if my sexual needs became that demanding

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    • my husband said to tell you that he could masturbate to a pile of dog s*** that all guys do it no matter what and stimulus he doesn't need stimulus

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    • baby how sweet thank you

    • I was raised in the south that this how I talk

Most Helpful Girl

  • Yikes, I'm really sorry that you are experiencing this. My heart goes out to you. I'm no professional and I've never been married either.. but I'll try my best.

    Wow, 30 years! I wouldn't just throw that away. Marriage is a bumpy road and it takes both parties to work hard to make it work. Before you found nude pictures, how was the marriage? Was he loving, grateful and appreciative towards you? Were you two very happy in love before all of this?
    Most likely, if he was emotionally cheating on you, he feels dissatisfied in the marriage. This has nothing to do with you. You can be the perfect woman, but if a man wants to cheat, he will cheat. Its out of your control. Doesn't matter how great you are.
    You have to figure out the root of the problem - why is he telling other women he has crushes on them and sending nude pics? These women must be comfortable enough with him to send nude pictures to him.

    Possible reasons why a woman would send nude pictures: (1) he's been flirting with her/entertaining her for a while. He's an attractive man and she's trying to intice him even more.
    (2) They've been sexual with eachother before. She's comfortable sending him nudes. He's feening for her.

    First off, who is this woman? Is she from work? A close friend? A random woman from the internet? How does he know her.. because if he sees this woman a lot, it is worrisome. You know your husband better than anyone else on this website does. Women's inituition is a gift. Don't doubt it. We know when our men are lying to us, especially after 30 years... you know it in your gut.

    Also, since you are dealing with a disability, you are blaming his unfaithfulness on the fact that your sick.. which you shouldn't. Men cheat on healthy, abled women all the time. After being in a marriage for 30 years, it can get stale and men miss the excitement of something new. Maybe this women made him feel sexy again, I don't know...

    Anyway, this discussion has to happen with your husband. If he loves you, he will try to work this out with you. Even if it takes about a billion conversations about it until you have received all the reassurance you need.

    If you think it was just pictures and that's it. He's never shown any other sign of cheating and he's always been a great husband otherwise... It's forgivable. If you can move on from it and grow together from this experience... it'll be worth saving the marriage. BUT if he gives you no reason to stay, then that's the reason you should go.

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    • my husband says that he did not have sex with this woman that he had a momentary lapse in judgment and he acted like a juvenile in he's sorry. she was the one who initiated the pictures of her private parts and she was a friend of ours a bartender at a bowling alley so I guess it's her job to flirt with men. But as my friend I would have thought that she would have told me you know that he was doing that. my husband says it didn't last that long and he got disgusted when he went to her house and there's food all over the floors and she was just really gross and bites all over her face and legs and she was disgusting. he has professed his love to me and told me that he does not want to be with anybody else except me because nobody can take care of him like me and nobody can take care of me like him.

    • I wanted to say more but it wouldn't let me I want to say thank you I'm going to sweep this under the rug and try to make my marriage work 30 years is a long time to let go

    • there was no sex involved just texting and she initiated the sex pictures he didn't send her any

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • He doesn't love you and yes there's a lot more going on. Shame on you for staying

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    • I've been w him since I was 17. I am so mixed up inside.

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    • You still need to leave. There are programs out there to help you. I too am disabled and no way would I stay with someone like him

    • What's he to gain? He has a home and can have gfs to fuck at the same time. If one of his other relationships fail he has you as a backup

  • The only thing that is certain is that he's no longer satisfied with your relationship.

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    • he said he needed to work through juvenile thoughts he was having on the road and that he needed to realize that he had some one who loved him and was waiting for him. he quit that job and has been home with me taking care of me through my knee surgery. he says he loves me like crazy mad. I don't know what that means. he says he will never leave me because no one can take care of him like me and me the same. can I try to believe it can work? or am I kidding myself. will he do it again? he gave me his cell and never leave my side. should I let it go? it happened two years ago and he just confessed.

    • are you sure about your response

    • Of course I'm sure. But it doesn't mean he doesn't love you like he says he does or plans to leave. Humans are very complex beings and often times one person cannot satisfy another completely.

What Girls Said 1

  • Here is the thing, you can do any and everything for a man but that is no guarantee that he will remain faithful to you as you hope. Thats where a lot of females get this confused at sadly. You would hope and think that they would remain faithful but if a man has it set in his mind that he will cheat then that what he is going to do.

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