What do I do... I don't love him but I can't leave him?

he says he wants to marry me, and that he loves me more than anything. He calls me wifey, Aphrodite, he says im perfect for him. His dream girl. he is the sweetest person ever. He said that I'm his only happiness and and he can't/doesn't want to live without me. His personality is amazing, he is the best person I have ever met and probably will meet. He is so sweet, and kind, and understanding. God he knows exactly what to say, he is perfect. I want to love him, so so much. I just... can't. I'm not physically attracted to him. I am such a horrible person... His voice annoys me and he just isn't physically my type. I am also older than him by two years, which really bugs me. And he talks to me constantly, he freaks out and asks what he did wrong if I dont answer for more than 10 minutes. I've had no time for myself or for anybody but him since we met. I didn't leave me room all day, haven't eaten anything, haven't slept. I love him but I don't, I hope this makes sense... What do I do? How do I tell him I can't be with him anymore? God I'm crying as I type this, he deserves so much more than me, I don't deserve someone as amazing as him. If I leave him, he'll be destroyed. He said I'm his only happiness... he can't see a future without me. He wants a family, he wants to be with me forever... What do I do, please help me. Also, he lives on the other side of the country and we met like 4 days ago. We are both still so young, still in school. I know I know, "wow you are so stupid" I know I am. But please help me. It feels like we've known each other forever. I love him so much, I love who he is as a person. He has a heart of gold and doesn't deserve anymore sadness. I can't do it though. I can't stay like this, I can't love him the way he loves me. It'll only cause him more pain in the future. I don't want him to feel any pain ever again. Man it hurts to write this.. I'm sorry I'm so so sorry please understand me, please help me please I'm sorry. oh god what have I done


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I was in his position for like 2 years or so. I was relentless in my attempts to win her over even when I knew that she doesn't like me that way. Anyway, i feel like you care about your friend more than she cared about me so listen to what I tell you now. You either accept him or go, sit down with him somewhere and explain in detail what you feel about him. Make sure to tell him the truth. That you like him but can't settle for him because you don't feel attracted to him. And don't worry, he most likely already knows this and is only giving himself false hope. It will break him but it is what he needs and now when I think about it I wish I got that treatment instead of being dragged on like a moron for years.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • He sounds creepy tbh lol. If u dont fancy someone then don't even date them. U dont have to feel bad or make excuses for your feelings. Don't let him guilt trip u by being 'nice'. U like someone or u dont. You aren't doing him any favors by pretending to like him. And u won't magically grow to fancy someone who's very voice annoys u. Its a lesson I wish I learned when I was young - do not date someone u do not fancy. But DO make it clear you don't fancy them. Also don't try to stay Hus friend because trust me, 'sweet' men like him will take that to mean u might change your mind some day and still never leave u alone.

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What Guys Said 4

  • You're not horrible but you need to be honest with him and tell him you don't feel the same way as he does you. It isn't fair to either of you.

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  • You're 15. thats way too much stress. at this age you're not even a complete person. the future isn't even clear... don't stress over boys and relationships. Just focus on yourself and hobbies and interests and friends. those will take you farther than a romantic relationship at this point in time

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  • If he truly loves you, he'll want you to be happy no matter what, even if that means he can't be with you. You need to put your happiness first. Tell him that he means so much to you, and tell him he deserves a partner who will love him the same as he loves you.

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  • If you don't want to be in a relationship, you need to tell your partner asap because it isn't fair to either partner involved so you need to break the relationship up

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What Girls Said 1

  • Tell him that you love him as a friend but you can't be his girlfriend. It's going to be okay. It's not going to be a fun conversation but you're gonna be fine, I promise.

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    • I don't care if I'm fine. I want him to be fine. His happiness is more important

    • Then be ready to be miserable for the rest of your life because he won't be fine. At some point you have to do what's best for the both of you: break up. You don't want to be with him. He deserves the chance to find someone who does.

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