How do I break up with my boyfriend of 3 years?

Hey all! I'm a 21 year old flight attendant and pilot in training; I've come across a life challenge with my relationship and need some advice and knowledge.

My boyfriend and I have been together for about 3.5 years and recently my feelings and life have started pulling me away from our relationship emotionally and physically. I know it's time to break up I'm just so stuck on what ifs and how to do it.

My biggest fear is what if it's a mistake, what if nothing good comes from it, will I change my mind etc.

Another problem I'm coming across is my sway back and forth of, I need to break up with him and I'll just push though. Part of me really thinks we've just had our days and should go our own ways and another is saying how can you leave.

I know many people will say 'it'll all be for the better'. That's all I hope for but I need help getting out of that fear of letting go. And how to let go peacefully within myself and physically with him.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Do you feel you've gone as far as you can in the relationship? Has it turned stagnant? Do you feel the relationship has played out with nothing left for future growth?

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    • I don't feel like we have gone as far as we can go, I think we could be amazing people together. I have part of myself feeling like I could get there faster and happier on my own.

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    • It does! Thank you for your input it gives me more clear mindset of thought about my situation as a whole.

    • Good luck

What Guys Said 8

  • what you do is when you break up don't make it seem likely you can get back together. you explain to him as to why you are breaking up. you tell him that your life just doesn't have an aviable space for a boyfriend right now. tell him it's not that he did anything wrong but is that your life is too complicated and are trying to cutback.

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  • Sit down and talk to him and explain it in your own way with your own reasoning... just be honest and straightforward. It sucks but it's part of life. If the break-up is good, you guys may end up together later on down the road.

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  • Tell him it's not gonna work. Any time he tries to talk to you, just tell him "it's not gonna work" how ever he comes at you just repeat "it's not gonna work" that is all there is to it.

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  • why can't you at least figure out what caused that because the way you say it, it doesn't sound like he did something wrong or you did. i suggest you work something out and keep your relationship with him. you might be losing a good man

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  • Trust me love, it's not your fear it's a BIG mistake, I'm pretty sure there's some other dude who has show you some kinda interest, probably an older dude, think hard before doing what you wanna do, cuz you already know what to do

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  • Why do you wanna break?

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    • I want to break because I have very strong emotions towards being stronger and going further in life in a better path than I am now, on my own.

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    • Why can't I go further right now? Because the man I'm with isn't quite a man, he's more like a large child. Whom I love and care for but I haven't found myself in love with him for quite some time. It's just the points in our life that we're not matching up and it holds my potential back. I don't know how much but I know I could be doing better.

    • ''he's more like a large child.'' i know how that is. i hope this doesn't lead to a pattern.

  • Just do it. Dont overthink it

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  • just walk to hi and say breakup and dont look back to him...

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What Girls Said 2

  • you should talk about it with him. don't break up yet, just tell him you haven't been feeling the love and that you feelings are going back and forth. he'll help you in anyway possible and or fix whatever is not working to stay in your life, it would be the same if the roles where reverse.

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  • No breakup is ever unpainless. But you need to weigh up what you want more. And talk to him about it

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