Breaking up with a good guy. What do you think?



Ok please watch the video/link in this question. I truly believe that just being a good person in a relationship or even life is not good enough for a relationship. So I really felt like the guy being spoken about in the video. Cause I am the one hysterically crying and torn, and he is calm & so understanding.

I broke up with my boyfriend of two years. He is understanding, loving, good person and forgiving. But that is it. He has no raw intelligence, not a good communicator, not funny, not good at sex and cannot last, not financially stable. But also, I wanted to work on my career, studies, life and goals, and, family. I am seeking clarity in my life as well.

But I cried to myself because, i know how many awful type of men out there. But he is a good guy who comforts me when i am hurt. So breaking up with him, is the right decision, cause I can see I would end up cheating later on in our lives together.

But do you think being a good person, in his case, is someone no one should leave?

Updates:
I should state or emphasize that the two years of me being with him. I am the one that tried my heart out for making our sex, communication and i am the one who is the bread winner. I am the one who stayed awake wondering and researching ways to make my relationship better. I asked him so many times to try and he didn't. So please do not make my question as something shallow or bad. Just answer maturely please

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Most Helpful Guy

  • It's okay if you feel you're not compatible. There are different flavors of good guys: you're not obligated to stay the rest of your life with the first good guy who shows interest in you.

    Just make sure you're not trading him in for a bad guy, because that's 100% on you.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • There are a lot of good people out there but if there is not that connection, unfortunately being a good person alone isn't going to cut it.
    I know it feels wrong but you know the saying "you gotta be cruel to be kind". It will hurt him for now but in the long run you will both find partners who you are actually well suited to and he won't have to face the pain of you cheating or whatever down the road so in the end, he'll end up happier. Try think of it like that. Yes he is nice but he lacks in a lot of other areas, try to think of it like that.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Sorry honey, but you sound shallow as fuck. You left because he wasn't good at sex? Honestly, you might suck at sex. You left because he wasn't financially stable? So you are a gold digger?

    It's seems as though what you did was a good thing, that guy doesn't deserve a shallow bitch like you...

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    • You sure are sensitive about this. You are not mature enough to understand. Did you even listen to the video? I am 100% sure you didn't listen. And you surely didn't read. Have you ever had a girlfriend?

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    • I did read two years. You seem like a dumber person than him if you put up for it for two years. And you are shallow because you act as though you were obligated to be with him. Even as the most wicked man in the world says (Alester Crowley), "do what thou wilt." You do what you want. Free will. You kept prolonging the relationship. And if he was so bad why did you date him for two years? Because he's "nice?" You know how many girls don't even date guys because they are "nice?" You are full of shit and full of yourself, and you are more dull than my toilet bowl after number two.

    • Let me tell you something you 20 year old. You do not know jack shit about relationships. Your opinions no longer have value. I have never called you any names or tell you are full of shit. You are 100% wrong and not intellectual about what you say. You are ignorant. Bye

  • Everything you said was understandable. The raw intelligence and ability to handle money thing are huge. I won't date a woman who an't handle money. The bad in bed part just makes the situation worse.

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What Girls Said 2

  • if those factors were important enough to you to make you consider breaking up with him then maybe you just aren't the best match for each other. Good people are rare but out of all the factors you mentioned i think communication and humor are important in relationships, especially communication.

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  • being a good person is not enough

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