Coincidence? Repeating History?

Back in 2013, I started to casually date a coworker and things were complicated because she was also going on dates with another coworker.
In 2014, she told me she just wanted to date me after I quit, and we were in a relationship for awhile until she broke up with me because of religion.
Throughout 2015, I struggled to get over her. I knew she was looking at my Facebook, but it looked like she moved on.
Side piece, my favourite NASCAR driver, Jeff Gordon was retiring in 2015, and in the summer they had a program where you pay 125, and your name get on the car. I already put my name on it. But woke up suddenly one night with this feeling I needed to put hers on there too. and I did.
We spoke briefly in November, but she was mad I never called her after the breakup, and how we couldn't be together, and she didn't want me in her life. I shortly deleted my Facebook following because I didn't want to see her move on.
In June 2016, I woke up to a notification that she followed me on Instagram. A few days later, she messaged me. We wound up talking on the phone for 5 hours.
After a month, I couldn't handle just being her friend. So I told her I loved her, but had to let her go.
She refused to let me go that night. She decided before that to go on a mission for the LDS church.
She would move from Idaho to Texas to live with her parents, while I lived in Arizona.
A month later, she told me she loved me back. But she was constantly fighting with her parents about me, so I messaged her mom apologizing for our break up two years prior. Also said how much she meant to me.
She stayed with me for two weeks, and I proposed to her. She said she'd accept when she got back.
She pushed me away before and while she started her mission.
After a few months, I tried to talk to her, told her I loved her and everything. She said we can't be together and she forced herself to move on. She's still on her mission.

The same car program came up for another driver, and I put our names on again


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  • Don't do that. It's weird


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