Should I stay friends with my ex?

Long story short me and my ex just had a long talk. We broke up a little more than a month ago and I badly want to just move on but it's like I'm holding myself back because I guess I think maybe we could still get back together. I think I still love her. She told me she still cares about me and wants to be friends. I think that's great but I care for her iin a different way I think. I really wanna stop caring about her but I just can't. It makes it so much harder. I wanna be friends because I know that's what I should have with her but there's another part of me that just wants to be more. She broke up with me because she got scared of commitment. What should I do be friends with her or just step back from her? Maybe I should just tell her how I feel? I kinda told her a lesser version of this earlier. OK here are my 6 reasonings. 1. If I'm friends with her then maybe in the future something could happen again. 2. If I'm friends with her and nothing happens in the future I will feel worse. 3. Maybe being friends with her will help me move on. 4. If I'm not friends with her it gives me a less of a chance to get back with her eventually. 5. If I'm not friends with her and she gets with someone else long term then I might blame myself for not trying hard enough 6. If I'm not friends with her it might make me feel worse because I have special feelings for her and I see her daily. I would have to keep my distance. So what do y'all think? Also should I text her back tomorrow telling her what I've decided or want longer? I said I had to think about being friends and she said that was ok etc and seeyah Monday. I often want to find excuses to text her because it makes me feel better... I know I'm pretty messed up over this girl that's why I wish I just didn't care so I wouldn't mind being friends and it wouldn't be hard without her. Again though any input would be appreciated.


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  • I think you should either be her boyfriend or not be friends at all

  • I say tell her that you want
    to go long term and if there is any chance of that ever then she should say then as there is not too much to fear in long term as she can still end anytime, not like a contract ties her to you or anything. If she says no then break all contact. Being friends won't get you back together and even at best case will only get you one night stands at best and then more pain. Being friends with ex girlfriends is a bad idea as it almost never works and you will most likely not get back together. Being friends is more painful in the long run too, trust me, and does usually only happen if one party member is still in love it if neither ever was. I know it's tough but you'll get through this buddy, just choose the logical way and don't torture yourself by hoping for something that most likely won't happen if she says no the next time you see her. I am sorry buddy, unfortunately I know how you feel.

    • when we first broke up she said maybe we could get back together in the future or maybe we won't. She said we just need to see what happens. She's not opposed to getting back together in the future if it happens.

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    • I know that I need to just cut her out of my life but it's just hard because I really don't want to because I kinda still love her. Thanks for all the advice man.

    • Yeah that is natural man. You are welcome, hope everything will go well.

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