How to stop comparing ex?

What If you had the most amazing person...

They were sweet, caring, compassionate, great with kids, social, educated, doing very well in their career, had a good family, getting promoted to management as a women. Attractive, like they light a fire no other person can... Great with money, doesn't waste it on stupid things, wears runners on walks/hikes instead of high heels and doesn't care about trends... Just a simple person...

And they leave you and break your heart with no closure...

How do you move on, I just compare every girl to her... Yes some girls are more pretty, or more caring... but overall no girl in this world compares to her...

No other girl is even as close as good as her... and I've lost her :(

So how can I stop comparing her to other girls or how can I accept I'll have to settle with whoever I can get now?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I totally know how it feels especially comparing an ex to every guy i meet. I think the problem is it is either one of two things. First, that you are still in love with the girl (your ex) or second, that you are infatuated to the extent of creating in your mind that 'perfect' girl who does not exist. If you are still in love with her, I suggest you go out and try to win her back and solve the problems that tore you both apart. However, all this takes time to heal and get over the girl. Start focusing on things that make you happy excluding dating girls etc and eventually you will get over it. If you try to date another girl too soon when you still have feelings or are overly infactuated with the perfect ex then you will feel as though you will never find another person like her. Every girl has their flaws too, including your ex and if she let you go, that's her loss and she probably isn't worth keeping, yet comparing to other girls for. Hope this helps!

    • Well it's kinda both to be honest.

      I'm still in love with her and Infatuated with her, I think she is this God like women... I will accept her for anything she is, I'd put her happiness above mine.

      I feel like it's my loss, She is this god and I'll never have her... I'm not good enough for her? It really hurts

    • Hello?

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What Girls Said 1

  • Why compare every woman to her? She doesn't want you. If you compare every other woman to her, you're just preventing yourself from meeting someone who might want you.

    Do you want to be alone forever? Because you're setting yourself up for that right now.

    • Because I want someone better than her :(

      I am so lonely too

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    • That's because you have placed her on a pedestal.

      Buddy. She doesn't want you. Accept it.

      It's almost like you want to be miserable.

      A therapist could figure out why and challenge you to change that.

    • How can I take her off the pedestal?

      Like I would do anything for her, I would be with her even if she cheated on me or was disrespectful to me... I know it's not right, but for some reason I would do anything... I would tolerate anything...

      I would need a good therapist, I'm crazy I guess... It really hurts to try to accept she isn't into me, if she had just given me a chance... I felt like we were meant for each other...

      Well, maybe you're right, it's just easier to be miserable, because anytime anything good happened, or I was happy something would always go wrong and wreck everything... Love was the best feeling I ever felt, heartbreak the worst... I guess that's when I stopped living

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