Dinner with my ex, for the kids?

My ex recently suggested that a few times a month we have dinner together with our daughters. His reasoning is that he wants them to see us getting along and showing them that no matter what we will always be a family even if we aren't all together under one roof. He thinks its important for them to grow up seeing us still being kind, caring and respecting eachother.
The only problems i have is that i dont want to give them the wrong impression that we are getting back together because rite now its just not something that is gonna happen. Secondly we didn't end things because one of us didn't love eachother or anything he just put work first too much and i wanted him more family oriented and to put at least our girls first but he just could never stop working! I dont want to give him hope that now that he wants to try to change things will go back to normal although he says thats not what he's trying to do.
what would you do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • mercy wins over anger

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I admire your ex. He wants to be very much in his daughters' lives and yours as well. There is nothing wrong with a man who works too hard but you have to talk to him about having false hopes of getting back together. Just respect the fact, he wants his kids to grow up with a loving and doting father. Your kids are blessed to have a selfless father like him. Many kids from broken homes wish they have a father like him

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    • there's a problem when he works, comes home locks himself in a room and works and never sees his kids to the point that he couldnt hold our youngest because she didn't recognize him.. and he wasn't working when he was home because he HAD to,, he WANTED to because he wanted more money & more money.. not that we needed because i have a good paying job and so does his and the work he was doing could have waited.. thats not really being selfless in my opnion

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What Guys Said 3

  • Just go for it, good idea

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  • I did this with my exe. Divorce fucks up your kids because their most reliable foundation cracked. They get over it eventually and making sure your kids know that daddy and mommy don't hate each other. And it is a gift to them to have mom and dad together with once a week or month or whatever. It's not a bad thing. Just make sure he know where you stand.

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  • he WAS putting his family first. everyone thinks times have changed but they haven't. a man is and probably will want to pay and take care for his family. Do you have a roof over your head? food in your stomach? a car? if helps provide he's doing it right. family means even in stressful work situations you still stick together.

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    • i have a roof over my head, food in my stomach, and a car because of ME! he wasn't putting his family first and he's admitted to it! when you go to work, come home and go lock yourself in a room and do more work that CAN be put off but your always looking for more ways to make money thats being selfish.. to the point that your youngest child doesn't even recongnize you! plus the fact that your spouse works as well so the "extra" work wasn't needed.. I don't know how you live but for me i contriubute just as much as who i am with and now by myself i do it ALL by myself, dont get it twisted..

What Girls Said 1

  • Yep go for it

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