How can I move on from a strong, past relationship that kills me every day and night, wanting it to be just a dream?

It's bin 4 years now. I threw away everything we've exchanged. Memories, fogging to past image and memories, taking shape of where we've walked and talked. Feelings that stay on you like burnt marks on your body. Energy that can't be shut of, or a best example. A torch that won't turn off no mater what you do to kill the fire. Forget that one you've called your "first and last." Whatever i do, she's the first image i see in my head, mid day, and night. Even when i look at a magazine, she appears, but is not her. it's bin this long. And i can't move on, keeping myself busy can help. what can i do?


Most Helpful Girl

  • This sounds like a broken man. :/ What have you been doing to keep busy? Have you been going out there and meeting a new potential girlfriend to fill the void? Or you been closing yourself in because you don't want anybody else to take her place. You cannot put your life on hold for someone who already left you 4 years ago. :/ I am so sorry

    • I just don't know what to do. I went out with one girl in the past month. But... i still felt empty... like, we kissed. No emotion, no thought. Hugging her didn't fill me with warmth. I felt dead. I want to move on, but my feelings are manifesting at the wrong time and mood.

    • Who broke up with who? Details pls

    • I broke up with her, it was unexpected to be hostile with me when i broke up with her. She wanted to meet at her place at night to talk over and resolve out relationship. We've encountered the same problems before, but it's in the past... i can remember the problems that were present. She was lesbian, i did not know at first. After telling me that, she said she was a feminist. More and more secrets emerged from her. I did not mind, so i keep it positive. I've made 3 tests. Patience, Control, and Respect. She fails all three. When i broke up with her on the phone. She called me a coward, she said more after that.. but i forgotten. She was my first, and last heart break girlfriend. Im 22, and i still feel empty. I have a smile to the world, bit i can't offer any real smile and joy in return.

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What Girls Said 4

  • You need a little magic to help you. Try the following: Imagine her on a balloon, which had nbeen fired up. Thank her for the good things she brought into your life, ask her to forgive you if did anything wrong, tell her that you forgive her and cut the ropes. Imagine the balloon to go up, and disapoear in the sky. Do this little magic exercise right before falling asleep and first thing after you wake up. You will get healed real soon. Just must be persistent in doing it.

  • This is a bit obsessive. You may want to think about professional help.

    Good luck.

  • Aw man that is rough :( . Maybe talking to a therapist to work through all the feelings you have and are holding on to

  • Do you still talk to her?

    • No, not in over 4 years. Competing 4 1/2 December.

    • Show All
    • She was my first date, first kiss, first lover, first trouble maker, first everything. Which makes it hard, i do believe you. Just difficult.

    • Totally understand

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