He said I was only good for sex?

So, in short, I found out my boyfriend had been cheating on me with a girl on our university's cheerleading team, and now he's dumped me to be with her. The last thing he said to me was "You're only good for one thing anyway..." and this really hurt me. As in, I can't get over the fact that he said that. It's seriously made me question my self-worth and re-evaluate whether I'm worthy of love. I'll admit I hadn't been as attentive to him these past few months because I've been working towards getting into my dream study abroad program in Italy and learning Italian. I admit I don't have a cheerleader's body or athletic ability. I admit there were things about myself I could've worked on, but he had plenty of flaws as well!!! I have absolutely no idea how to recover my self-esteem now. I have no motivation to do anything, and right now is when I need motivation the most...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • First off... I'm really sorry you had to go through that, though I'm the other hand I'm glad you're rid of him. While you may have liked or even loved him, he didn't love you in return and for your sake I'm glad you didn't end up in that relationship for any longer than you were.

    Second, people try to degrade others to justify treating them poorly "she's just good for sex no one else could REALLY love her so I'm no different than anyone else." He said that to hurt you for the sake of hurting you. Not a word of it is true. The very fact that you're dedicated to and are working towards your dream goes to show you have determination, a sense of drive, and dedication. Nothing that happened was your fault as far as I can tell. And you've proven simply in the fact that you acknowledge you were more distant that you are a sincere person, to be loved and treasured. If any tell you otherwise... well they're lying to you. You're special and hopefully there will always be people who see that in you. ☺

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Honey, you're a human being. No human being is only good for sex. You have a brain, you can think and do things. You are good for whatever you want to be good for.
    Look, at the end of the day, he cheated. Everyone knows cheaters are the scum of the earth right down there with pedophiles and people who hit old ladies. He's a bad person, anyway. Why would you take the opinion of someone like that, seriously?
    Just realise that you made a mistake by being with such an asshole. You're free now to focus on you and to find out all the wonderful things you're good at, most definitely more than sex.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 11

  • Oh please. Even *if* this WERE true, only a complete and utter dick would say it, so that's what he is, a complete and utter dick, and his opinion is worth what any dick's opinion is worth - nothing.

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  • Well wow wow all these SJWs are here saying poor you but it's rather obvious that you're leaving out a HUGE part of this story. I mean you pretty much said there's a TON you could have worked on.

    Before you go looking for sympathy, please tell us the WHOLE story.

    And if you think you're not worthy of "love", then you're NOT worthy of "love".

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  • The best thing I've learned is to not let others define your self worth, you know who're you, and you know what value you've. Somebody may disagree, but they're not important anyway.

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  • Maybe make the next guy wait a bit longer before having sex. You should learn about each other. That way guys like him will move on and you'll be screamed at for not putting out, but hey it's better than the former.

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  • That's just his opinion. He's probably holding the same mindset to the lass he switched to and every woman before you.

    Just remind yourself that he was a dipshit and you were simply unlucky in falling for him.

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  • I want the whole story and you tried to frame "you giving no attention" to him part as nothing but I need full story.

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  • He was angry and said what he needed to say to hurt your feelings. It isn't true, real life is complicated and so are you, probably.

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  • I mean no disrespect, but people are easy to read. His behavior and the way he talked should have given you a red flag before you went with him. You are not only good for sex, you actually sound like a decent person

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  • Fuck that dude you seem like you have your head in the right place don't let some jackass try to bring you down fr by the way you talking you cared and he just a peace of shit

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  • Fuchs him. He's a douche

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  • Do you have Kik or SC

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What Girls Said 5

  • It's possible that he said this as a way to justify his horrible behavior. I. e. "I did nothing wrong because she was only good for sex anyway." It's still terrible, but it says more about him than it does about you. Either way, he does not get to define your worth of value as a human being. And you're clearly better off without him, anyway. I know that's little consolation, but with time, I hope you'll see that he did you a favor by showing his true colors. And they reflect on him, not on you.

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  • Sorry to hear this. :( he's not a loss. You deserve so much better than a two timing ungrateful inconsiderate boy! When I got cheated on, I lost all my respect and love for my ex in a week! Idgaf how long we were together or what we shared. He broke my trust and that alone made me stronger. be strong

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  • This is why you wait for marriage to have sex. Because he used you and now your the one who got hurt mostly. And why it's often said premarital sex is selfish sex. Everybody deserves to be loved in a romantic sense. But the problem is your robbing yourself of that and your ability to love PROPERLY by doing what your doing.

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  • Guys are dogs
    Look good every day
    Don't ever get back to him
    Ignore the fuck out of him
    Find you a new man

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  • You were only trying to focus on your dream... forget him and focus on you a guy like that doesn't really care and he probably will leave the other girl too

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