Asked a girl I have talking to if she is interested in me (ends badly)?

There was this girl that i know since childhood. I was 17 year old when i first approached her and asked her if she is interested in me sending her texts on her phone (stupid i know) i had a crush on her back then she said no and we didn't talk after that.

Forward to about when in was in University 23 years old and doing my engineering. The girl i mentioned adds me on her social media and i start talking to her. We start to talk and things turn out good. Those old feelings start to come back and i started to like her but i had doubts in my mind that she might not think the same way.

I text her one day and ask her " i would like to know if you want to get to know me better" (it's a vague way to ask someone if they are interested but i thought she would get it). She answers "yes definitely" i am over the moon at this point and we hit it off by chatting and sharing snaps etc with each other. We would almost do that daily for about two months i guess. I start to assume she likes me too.

At the time of writing this article 30 mins ago we had a conversation where it turns a bit deep and i tell her "i like you". She says "what?" " Why would you even say that" and starts to demand answers about why i told her that. At this point i am in shock and devestated and things turn downwards from there.

She says that she had only two people she like some senior in her college and some other guy. She says " do you want to know if i am interested in you? No". It sank my heart when she said that.

Afterwards she says that" we can be friends and we can talk like the same if you want to". I simply text her" it's best if we don't." We haven't talked yet.

I feel really sad. I opened up to her and i being an introvert shared things i hold dear to me and it all ends in vain. I know it's partially my fault because i told her i liked her. I should have waited a little more. I am just writing this so that i may vent my thoughts on this platform.
i would like your opinion on this.


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  • You broke the cardinal rule of dating a woman you never say you like a girl until after you slept together since you come across too much like relationship vibe. If she did like you have put her off and come on too strongly. Have you hung out alone together?

    • Dude from where i am sex is considered a taboo until marriage. i am sorry to say. We did hang out some but not that much...

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    • Dude i can't wrap my head around the thing when she said "yes definitely" she would like to get to know me and things start to escalate why would she say "you wana know if i am interested in you? no" it hurt me bad man...

    • Thanks man. I feel shitty right now. I keep blaming myself and start to wonder why i did something like that and why would she react that way... I know time will pass and all this will end but still...

  • I think it went downhill the minute you asked her if she wanted to know you better, we introverts need validation and that's where the problems start. Also I don't blame you for texting (it's generational) but next time text a lot less and take her to a coffee shop or a casual meeting before deciding if you actually like her. She might be a good texter but a nasty person.
    Life and older women have taught me girls will never consider a needy or insecure guy as a dating candidate. If they like you they will just friendzone you. Anyhow, it seems like she has a bit of issues also. It's over and done, Move on, plenty of nice women out there. Grab a couple buddies, an Uber and go have a few beers, that will help letting go ;)

    • Appreciate the insight man :) I'll keep that in mind next time

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    • Thanks man appreciate your concern. The thing that bothers me most is that i thought things were going good and i shared my secrets with her. After she said she is not interested in me, i felt exposed and vunerable. I hope i get over her soon for good. Thanks again man

    • Just like guys that play with women there are plenty women that play with guys. They want to feel desired and in control. It's only when things get real that they bail out. Believe me, you DONT want women like that in your life. in my opinion you dodged a bullet. Still have things to change on your approach but Brother nobody is perfect and even well seasoned pro's get ditched even when approach is flawless. It's a numbers game.

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