Hey guys, I just need somebody to talk to, since I have no one else. My boyfriend and I were dating for 4 years and we broke up. It’s been 4 months since our break up and it gets hard for me when he moves on. I’ve been trying my best to get over him, we were friends but I just stopped talking to him and did the no contact rule, and I’m still doing it. I’ve even started going different routes since we go to school together just so I won’t see him. I used to hate the sight of him, but I’ve honestly don’t hate him anymore. He broke up with me and tried to keep in contact but as you guys know I stopped all that. He would try to call or text or say hi to me in the hallway, I’d decline his calls but I would speak and say hi back. Then he gets a new girl and now I feel like I’ve made no progress and now I’m here crying and sad wondering why I can’t get over him. Then I guess him and the other girl didn’t work out so not even a week has gone passed and now he’s with a new girl. And NO! I’m not worried about him. I kid you not it’s like he strategically placed where he’s gonna let me find out where he has a new girlfriend. Like he does his stunts right where he knows I’ll be. But maybe I’m wrong? Maybe I just happen to be there? Every time I find out I die a little inside. I wish I didn’t have to always witness this, I always try to make progress and it seems like nothing works. I even took a break from social media to just find myself, spend time with family, and friends. I’ve been happier. But every time he pulls those kind of stunts I just get hurt. I’m tired of hurting I want to get over him, but nothing is working! I’m really mad at myself, because there’s this guy, my bestfriend that I’ve fallen for. And I won’t even express my feelings or anything Bc I know I’m not over my ex and I refuse to just make him a rebound. How Can I get over him? How Can I stop hurting when he continuously finds new girl friends and it always happens in front of me?
Most Helpful Guy
Look at the whole situation objectively. ,, a boy breaks up with his girlfriend which he dated for over 3 years.,, u r not the first u won't be the last on this path. Find urself a hobby - books, music, art, gym. And the most important dont let urself have time alone always find urself something to do , cleaning , jogging , doing homeworks1
Most Helpful Girl
Oh honey... I feel so much empathy for you :(
I know what you're talking about... When Levi and I dated, he was my everything. And when he broke up with me and went after my best friend, I fell apart. We had a 7 year friends with benefits on/off fling... We both confessed to each other that we were afraid that we would never love another person as much as we loved each other.
No, I don't doubt he is probably doing it strategically--maybe even subconsciously. Because he wants some sort of reaction out of you, to know that you still care. I could be wrong, but it sounds like you went silent for a while... and that might have bothered him to not have gotten a more dramatic reaction. I will be honest though, it sounds like this relationship isn't going to go anywhere. And I am afraid it will be one of those ones you want to go back for...
I don't know how you get over these kind of things... you kind of just do it. Life forces you forward... and you drag your feet along You isolate yourself for a while, let yourself grieve... and then keep moving. It's like a marathon. You might stop for a bit, but you just keep moving towards the finish line.
I feel terrible for you because there is no clean, cut answer as how to get over this quickly or painlessly. All I can say is... it can be done :)1