Opinions on new relationship after divorce?

Married for almost 13 years. Have 3 kids.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Ugh, been there. Stay single for a while, learn how to live alone, and focus on your kids who are trying to heal also. When you do meet someone, don't wait forever to introduce her to the kids. That interaction could make or break a relationship and you don't want to be too invested already.

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What Girls Said 16

  • Not a smart idea. Marriage is not a game just for you to divorce and start over. I feel sorry for the children. This was your choice and the mother's. What was the point of getting married just to get a divorce? What is that teaching your kids? Do anybody think about this before they get married, or think about marriage? Again, my heart goes out to the innocent children who didn't ask for this. I find divorce for the wrong reasons selfish. You should never rush into getting into a new relationship. You should want to try to reconcile with your ex-wife. But if the kids are young, focus on the kids, not yourself. This is not the time for selfishness. That is my opinion.

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    • Eeeew. You're gross for laying all that on him. It only makes you look psycho, by the way. He wasn't asking that. You have NO CLUE what happened in their PRIVATE 13 year relationship. Damn. It ain't your business. Tighten up, lady. Your screws are fallin out.

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    • that is why a lot of people stay single because it takes a lot of work. at the same time you don't need somebody who's going to fight with you all the time over Petty nonsense. you cool down you take a break and you talk about it like civil adults. this is why you talk about these things before you become official with somebody in dating. not one about how cute a guy is or how fly and sexy. or how she got a big ass, you're ready to tap that. that's that garbage that goes through your brains and you want to know why you got into problems you end up with.

      understand what I'm saying, you need more than love just to uphold a marriage. this is real life, not this fantasy crap people keep reading in those books and see on TV. if you have nothing else to offer other than your body or love or whatever it is that you want the promise then you don't need to be married. that is all I'm telling people.

    • another thing to point out, since both of you want to diss me about me not knowing about marriage or children. let me just point out that is not about the good times all the bad times you deal with in marriage. it's about the process that you both go through together what it if it's true suffering or in enduring the hard times. many do not take it seriously into somebody actually does something that will affect their marriage. everybody Handles in marriage differently but it still requires the same amount of work. some require more than others. but marriage is still a marriage. if you cannot foresee yourself being committed to that person to the day you die then it's already over before it even started.

  • Don't worry too much. I'm a big Believer in the rebound to just shake off the weirdness a bit. But anyways, be patient and enjoy your life, start some hobbies, become the person you'd want the woman of your dreams to fall for. Stay true to your self. Be a good father. Be a great friend. Do crazy stuff. You'll be a chick magnet in no time.

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  • If your're recently divorced I would put dating on hold for a while and just focus on yourself and kids.

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  • Every relationship we have brings a new experience and perspective to our lives. Even if it's just for fun or rebound. Go ahead! Have some new experiences and have a little fun!

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  • I've been divorced and separated since March. I tried the online dating thing. Did not like it. I choose to remain single by choice at the moment. Im very fortunate to have a best guy friend who is always there for me. I think I would just try to take things slow, maybe be friends with someone first and see where it goes.

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  • It's a sad thing some parents think they have the right to have children while they can't guarantee a happy family for them... do whatever you can for those three kids, that's my opinion and of course your duty as a father.

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    • i don't think you're married or having kids at all.

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    • you're totally wrong about my baby. i don't think someone would complain for having 2 places to call home. one in a big city, other by the sea. and being bilingual by birth

    • I do hope you're right.

  • You have better luck with someone who is also divorced with children

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  • It’d be a bit different but it’d be doable as long as both partners are willing to be patient and work with one another

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  • I was married for 22 years. It took me 5 years before I was comfortable to go out. Just dont jump into anything.

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  • Sure. What do you need help with?

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  • When my parents got a divorce when I was 5 I lived in a truck for half a year and when I went to my dad's the roof of the trailer was caved in from an ice storm.
    They tried to use me and my sister as weapons against each other, "Tell the judge you want to live with mommy" when my mom had an abusive boyfriend.

    Just don't be like my parents. After they got their shit together I didn't mind having two separate bedrooms.

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  • Realize you may have a harder time because people without kids don't often want to be dating people with kids. You also will probably be questioned about why you divorced. Otherwise good luck, dating is hard for everyone

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    • Generally people his age are more understanding about dating people with kids. You don't get to 36 without a little complication in some form or other.

    • @Claire2017 I wasn't trying to insult him. Just telling him something to bare in mi d. I agree people are more excepting of kids in their 30s, but still newly single people sometimes don't realize it will add complications to an already complicated thing. You are not only dating for yourself but your kids. Plus even some 30 year olds don't want to date someone with kids, because not everyone likes kids or wants them

    • I agree, even at any age for some people it's a deal breaker!

  • Wait, focus on it kids

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  • I think its really hard to start a new relationship after Getting divorced I've been separated 8 yr divorced 3 and I'm single by choice scared to let anyone to close

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    • don't fear from love, i say. just don't make it a life goal... and when you don't expect it.. happens

  • Do what makes you happy🤷🏾‍♀️ you don't have to be alone because you are divorced.

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  • Don't rush dating. Learn more about yourself. Get a feel for dating again. Do what feels right for you.

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