Help. Marriage/divorce?

So I need to ask u guys if u can help me. I'm married to a man for a year and we been together since 2007. So 11 years all together. And he said to me like about 3 days ago he don't love me. And he wants a divorce. I don't understand why he would wanna throw that away... I'm scard he will leave me. He said i can stay till summer because of the weather because I have no place to go. But he don't love me. He willing to do married things like sex and stuff but he says don't get attached before we have sex. I told him I won't I just wanna have sex. But too late I been attached 11 years ago. I don't know why he wants to leave me. I'm soo stressed out. He says we always fight. But we fought last time because I'm very jealous girl like when he looks at another women I get all upset. I told him if he wants to see me half naked then why not look at me. I asked him if there was anyway we can talk about it and fix it. And I'll try to be understanding but he said no I don't love u. I cry every night. I don't know if I can take not being with him. I'll loose it. He means so fucking much to me. Like I don't know how to even describe it.. can someone please help me. I'm trying to call a councler. So u can meet with them. I asked him if he wanted to go and he said no counlers are for nuts. He won't be in a room with them.. sorry I type a lot but I wanted to make sure I have enough detail so I can have help.. So please comment back to me. Thanks so much


Most Helpful Guy

  • It sounds very simple to me, he said he doesn't love you, there's nothing you can do to change that, you should move on with your life, just as he is gonna with his, might be hard at first, but it's doable, you used to live without him before, you can do it again.

    • It's 11 years sorry maybe u can throw that away but I can't. I asked for someone to help me figure out how to stay together. My father said he might be just playing games but I don't know I don't know how to figure it out

    • First of all, your question says Help. Marriage/divorce, now you are taking the divorce out of the equation? or maybe you just wanted people to tell you want you wanted to hear? Well, sorry to burst your bubble, but your marriage sounds broken for a while, and if you think denying it can make it better, go ahead, you will only make things worst.

      And it's not throwing away anything, it's facing reality, when someone doesn't feel the same for you and it's not even willing to try and work it out, it's pretty obvious it's time to move on, for both's sake.

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What Guys Said 4

  • You should just disappear. I'm sure he will come back. Often, men can't handle things out of their short presumptuous mindframes. Do what they don't expect, you'll win every time. I hope you manage to get whatever it takes to make you feel great. Be that him, or anybody else.

  • Sorry but there isn't much what you can do what will be beneficial in long terms. Forcing him to stay with you (with one he doesn't want to be) only will create bigger issues later on

  • he married u just for sex n nothing else

    • No he loved me when he married me. He married because we been together for so long. So I don't know

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    • Umm well sometimes we have it everyday and sometimes we did it like 2 times a week or so. He works out a lot because he dose mma so that will wore out

    • u have your answer babe...
      he was with u just for sex
      he is with u just sex
      now that he is bored of it, he does not want u anymore

  • Counseling is not for nuts, if you go on your own it’s possible he will want to join just to see what you’re saying about him, they usually say no to counselors because they have someone else on the side and just want to be with them, that’s why my ex wife wouldn’t go because she had other plans and agenda

    • Ur right it's not for nuts. But maybe I wrote the questions wrong I'm trying to ask people what could I do to make him stay with me and love me. All these posts from different people is not what I'm looking for. i mean for a man to mean I don't love you after 11 years makes no since unless there a heartless bastard. And when these people say when he don't love u he dont. I don't know I guess I'm not explaining it right. I'm just stressed out and scard and I don't know what elts to do. And on top of it my gramma might not make it. She's in hospital.

    • He may be saying it to scare you since you get into fights often about lots of things, maybe he thinks you’ll try to change after hearing this since he said you could stay until you find a place and still have sex. That part doesn’t make sense since I couldn’t just make love to someone I don’t love. He also doesn’t realize that you get half of everything and alimony if you divorce so maybe you should tell him that too. Sorry to hear about your grandmother too

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