How would (did) you "overcome bitterness" after a "sour breakup"?

How would (did) you "overcome bitterness" after a "sour breakup"??


0|0
420

Most Helpful Guy

  • 1. Cry all you want. Let the tears flow, it's healthy you are releasing grief and pain. You may be afraid to start because you're fearful you'll never stop, but you will.

    2. Do something everyday to help yourself heal. Exercise, read, watch some self-help TV/DVD's, learn to meditate and never underestimate the power of positive prayer. Pick things that you know will be fun or beneficial and do them. Don't wait for the mood to come over you, take one action and then take another.

    3. Find emotional support. There are numerous groups for the newly single (more for women than for men). If you want therapy, go to www.therapistfinder.com to find a licensed marriage and family therapist in your area. Just don't try to tough it out or go it alone, support from others is healing, even if those people never become close friends.

    4. Don't be a doormat. If your soon-to-be-ex continues to call you or simply won't go away (or move out) tell them you can't heal with them around and ask them to keep their distance. If they are harassing or threatening you it is best to call law enforcement for information and advice.

    5. Keep busy. If you wake up early take a walk, go out to breakfast or do something around the house. Try a little "retail therapy" (go shopping) or enjoy the decadence of going to a movie in the middle of the day. Many businesses allow their staff to take "mental health days" if needed. If you can't sleep do the crossword puzzle, read or watch TV. Don't sit in your room and ruminate, you have to free your mind so your heart can heal.

    6. Don't try to mask your pain by trying to find a replacement. We all know the term "rebound relationship" these happen when we (unconsciously) use another person to fill the gap that's been created by the ending of a relationship. These transitional connections can feel healing in the short term, but if you don't process your pain appropriately you will not be able to be in a fully committed partnership.

    7. Don't spend too much time alone. Hang out with friends or make new ones, go to coffee with someone you can talk to, volunteer in your community. You will need time alone, but if you isolate yourself you won't be able to fully process your feelings or get the support you need to heal.

    8. Trust your feelings. Even if you were taken by surprise by the breakup, your inner voice is telling you something. Listen carefully and you will hear that it will all be OK. You just have to let your feelings guide you.

    0|0
    0|0
    • 9. Take your time. Don't rush out and buy a new car or move to a new home or another town. Major changes like those are merely a way of avoiding your feelings. Believe that with a little time, patience and support you will feel better and find love again.

      10. Research. Find out what others, who have not just survived but thrived after their relationships ended did to achieve peace of mind. There are some great books on surviving a breakup, my favorite is "How to Survive the Loss of a Love" by Peter McWilliams. This little gem will give you insight, exercises and some sage advice for dealing with this heart wrenching issue.

      Trust that you were not put here to suffer and that your live will not just be OK, it will be wonderful. Love will come again and next time, if you have truly processed your feelings, it will be much better. Having to work through some alone time doesn't need to be totally painful. Remember that even though change is mandatory, suffering is optional.

      Hope it helps

Most Helpful Girl

  • Let yourself grieve at first. After some time you'll be able to take a step back and realize you deserve better. And the best revenge is to move on and be happy without them.

    1|0
    0|0

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 19

  • My bitterness isn't because of breakup, but I try to speak less now and wait for few seconds before I respond to someone. It gives me the control

    1|0
    0|0
  • Time, lotsand lots of time.

    Focused on improving myself, living well (exercise, sleep, eat healthy) and be good to others. Oh, and limited contact with her to emails whenever possible. It worked well.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Time.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Quite simply, the focused refusal to allow myself to turn bitter.

    Taking the time to acknowledge and take personal responsibility for the parts I played in it was half the battle.

    The other half was coming to the revelation that most of my girlfriends up to this point weren't of the most... stable.. variety.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Clear your palate with neutral tasting unleavened bread, rinse with spring water, and ask for a new bottle.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Just do something u like to do and chase ur dreams. Try to spend some time with family and friends. Try some overtime work or else try to concentrate on the gym activities. Maintaining your body by doing workouts will make ur mind harder and it will help u feel so much relieved.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Continue living your life and focusing in your goals. But don't worry if you still have "negative feelings" toward the person even after sometime. It's normal and may never even go away especially if you felt that they did you really wrong. The important thing is to not focus on it

    0|0
    0|0
  • I love your Photoshop skills. Your boobs legit look bigger.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I still struggle with it. I lash out more often now, especially with family.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I just forget about it, I don't get emotional after a break up anymore. To be honest, I forget get name haha

    0|0
    0|0
  • I dont, i just get even

    0|0
    0|0
  • I never had that but I guess try not dating for a while have some fun with friends and hangout in your apartment. Have a nice friend party and I 6 months or more go find and try dating again.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I just think all the negative things about her

    0|0
    0|0
  • I just dealt with it & forgot about the person

    0|0
    0|0
  • Talk to my friends !! Having conversations and expressing urself helps !!

    0|0
    0|0
  • Smile even if it hurts.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Alcoholism

    0|0
    0|0
  • Listen to music. Stay away from couples!!๐Ÿ˜Š

    0|0
    0|0
  • Keep your mind busy, could be time for a total make over.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 3

  • Give it time.

    1|0
    0|0
  • It's very hard, but letting going of everything. Or just letting time pass.

    0|0
    0|0
  • By praying

    0|0
    0|0
Loading... ;