- Other... (share your experiences)
Most Helpful Guy
Yes and no. In my experience it's almost never a true friendship post breakup.
To me a friendship is only a true friendship when that is all both parties want and nothing more. They don't want to prove they're happier than you or to make sure you're not doing "too well". They don't want to check in on you for any reason other than catching up on a friend. They're not checking you out physically and thinking about your sexual past or what it would be like to do that again now (even for a moment). They're not thinking "I made the right or wrong decision" in the breakup. They're just experiencing you as a friend and wanting nothing more than that. There's no jealousy or competitiveness of any kind.
Having that with an ex is almost impossible, unless you were platonic friends in the beginning and even then it's hard. So while yes it's totally possible to be "friends" with an ex. You'll never really be friends again. It's not the same thing. Just friendly towards one another and share some good memories.
A good contrast (assuming you're straight) is think about your friendship with a close friend of the same sex. If the emotions of that friendship are the exact same with an ex, then it's possible for you to have that with that particular ex. Because a guy isn't looking at his guy friend thinking about fucking him, even for a second. He's not thinking about what "could have been" because he's not gay lol. Same for straight girls towards other female friends.2
Most Helpful Girl
Absolutely. I'm friends with a number of my exes. No old feelings left over, we've all moved on and are with new people and happy.
People who can't accept a change in the relationship dynamic or who still hold the idea there may still be a chance... those people will not be able to maintain a platonic relationship without serious difficulty.1
- Show AllShow Less