My best friend, doesn’t want to be my friend anymore 😢?

By male Bestfriend who I've talked about in previous posts came to New York this weekend for a family function, we have hardly spoke since we’ve moved out, and for the past 3 weeks he hasn’t spoken to me, untill he texted me and told me he’s in New York this weekend. He brought his girlfriend with him who I hate and everyone hates family/ and friends. He told me that he was staying in a Airbnb 2 mins away from my house and that he wanted to see me and wanted me to come with him to his family event, but his girlfriend doesn’t like how close he is with me and his family, so I really never saw him the whole time he was here, I feel like he’s been ignoring me and shutting me out because she complains and gives him a hard time when it comes to being my friend, yes I am still in love with this man, but I’m trying to come to terms with not being able to be with him. But now I feel like I’m losing my Bestfriend in the whole world forever and it’s killing me what should I do? My best friend, doesn’t want to be my friend anymore 😢?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Ask him to meet him one last time face to face and tell him to tell his girlfriend about this last meeting of you. In this meeting tell him everything about how you are hurt and tell him that he is your best friend but this is our last meeting because of your girlfriend and you settle this meeting so you can release your conscious about confessing everything you have and you feel about this and him and to make his conscious more awake toward what he is doing with this friendship and that he is ending it because of his girlfriend and him too... Basically say everything you feel to say and need to be said because eventually this will be your last meeting. After this move on from all of this once for all and tell yourself that it had the occasion to express itself for one last time. If his consciousness is fully aware about what is he doing he will make serious efforts to fix things, or if his consciousness is weaker than the authority of his girlfriend he will make a big mistake losing a wonderful person.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You can be “best friends” with someone you’re in love with. It just doesn’t work. His girlfriend is rightly being wary of you, you want what she has and it’s been time for him to make his choice and he hasn’t chosen you. Respect that and take the time to heal, start dating again and move on. It won’t always be this awkward unless you make an issue of it

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 5

  • That's tough. You've made your feelings known to him? Even if not, his girlfriend probably can tell you like him... and maybe even he likes you.

    If you haven't told him your feelings, explain to him that you feel you're growing apart.

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  • I think your feelings for him are clouding your judgement. He obviously wants to remain your friend, otherwise he would not have said he wants to see you. The girlfriend is obviously suspicious of you, and technically speaking she's not wrong to think so, considering yiu do in fact live her boyfriend.

    It's a complicated situation for sure, but even if he spends less time with you to appease his girlfriend it doesn't mean that he doesn't want to be your friend anymore. It's the girl, not him

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  • I read replies and I am sad to say but get rid of him. Been there when a woman really love was with a man no one liked.
    He knows the girl no one likes and he is using to control her. He is a bully and I fear for his girlfriend, I think he has a dark side that when you see it, you will hate him than love hin.
    I always say that if a woman love and trust is the hardest to change. For most women think you are calling a fool or so on.
    But if I was you, go to this girl and see if he has beeb violent to her. I feel your eyes are blinded by the fact you love him to see that he is or could be a control freak monster

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  • Wait till he realises his girlfriend is trying to pry him away from everything he holds close. Until she is around and he does everything she says, it's hopeless.

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    • So when he did come see me he did tell me that she’s still speaking to her ex boyfriend and that he spoke to her ex and told him to leave her alone, so basically he’s playing Tug a war with this girl and her ex and she just has my Bestfriend rapped around her finger

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    • And honestly, with him knowing all of this and he still deals with her, I don’t think he cares that he’s pushing everyone away all he wants is her

    • It's like he is in her trance. But reality will smack him in the face at some point. It's gonna hurt him real bad but hopefully it's before everyone else pushed him away too.

  • Leave him is best solution so far for you

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What Girls Said 5

  • I read your previous posts about the situation and if he was honest with his girlfriend and told her about his past with you and it involved being sexual she probably sees you as a threat which would be why she doesn't want you around him. Regardless of his family or you liking her or not people like who they like. As for you still having feelings for him you'll have to move on he clearly doesn't care about you enough to want to have a relationship or a friendship if all of sudden he ended things with you and moved out/away. I know it sucks cause I've been there just cut him off he isn't good for you.

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  • I'm gonna be completely honest with you. This can turn only turn out a few unfortunate ways. If the girlfriend doesn't like him hanging out with you.. more than likely, he will respect his girlfriend's wishes and keep minimal contact with you... especially if he is serious about this girl. That is what you do in e relationship.. you respect each other wishes. She will more than likely find your persistence about hanging out with "her boyfriend" suspicious and won't understand why you won't respect her wishes. She will more than likely find your closeness with her boyfriend a threat to her. More than likely, "I'm losing my bestfriend in the whole world and it's killing me.." won't still well with her. His girlfriend is supposed to be his best friend. Most people will always choose their lovers over their friends. I highly suggest just confessing your feelings to him privately and seeing if he does truly have the same feelings for you.

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    • I have told him how I feel, he knows that I am in love with him , he did say that he wanted nothing more and we have moved on from it, but now it’s like he wants nothing to do with me

    • But honestly when he did come visit me this weekend he was venting to me that he caught the girlfriend still speaking to the ex boyfriend and that she’s still in love with him and that he doesn’t trust her he spoke to her ex boyfriend and he’s basically playing tug a war with this girl but I feel like she’s not good for him not because I love him just because I could see this is not going in the right direction

  • Unfortunately, you'll have to be upfront with him about the distance. Tell him how you respect his relationship but that you really miss him as a friend. Maybe even talk to the girlfriend as well, civilly of course.

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    • Haha I commented nearly the exact same thing.

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    • But also I’m Bestfriends with his family members so I can’t even run from him even if I wanted too, I’m Bestfriends with his 3 female cuzins, I’m Bestfriends with his brother, when I go to hang out it’s still with his family

    • Yes he does know I’m In love with him, and he’s told me he doesn’t want to be with me, that’s he’s not in love with me, we were sexual a lot, and at one point In time we were being Secret lovers he was very romantic it was like I had a husband that I was living with for a while and then he just stopped and didn’t want anything with me anymore

  • Give some time... anf if he really care for u... he will never break the friendship... but if he chooses his love then i guess he is never your true frnd

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  • It is ok. Friends come n go

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