How would you feel if you found out the person you were emailing was really your boyfriend after you've said some pretty bad and dirty things?

aguyincalif
I pretended to be someone else emailing my ex girlfriend and when I seen her responses I was devastated but kept sending her emails for over a year discovering how far she was willing to take it. During that time she was sending this person nude pictures and videos of herself and was even planning on leaving me to be with the person she thought she was emailing. I had told her that I found out shortly after the emails started without divulging that it was me and she promised it would never happen again but 4 days later she was back at it with answering the emails and continuing doing the same things. During this time I trusted her to go out with her girlfriends that were in town and I was told there would be other men accompaning them but she swore she was only going to see her girlfriends and I need not worry. Three years later she hooked back up with one of the guys from that night and then dumped me for him. She accused me of cheating on her or looking for someone new so I could dump her which none of that was true. To this day which has been almost 14 months I have still been with no one but her since we met and haven't gotten over her meanwhile she selfishly jumped into her new relationship and hasn't spent one day alone to ponder our relationship. She totally blames me for pretending to be someone else via emails and she says she's done nothing wrong.
How would you feel if you found out the person you were emailing was really your boyfriend after you've said some pretty bad and dirty things?
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