now we broke up after a couple months right when we started to ger closer , we didn't have a single fight or anything and because of the things she said and how everything went down i belive she just really scared of getting hurt again and feeling the pain all over.
i gave her no reason to think i would do that to her but i believe her past is kind of a trauma for her.
now i'm wondering if i should reach out to her and tell her that i wouldn't do that to her and would never hurt her in anyway similar to what hapenned in her past?
Most Helpful Girl
This is a delicate issue and you should be careful. She is obviously very hurt by her past, but she is right. She is not yet ready for a relationship and you will have to respect that. She cannot truly make you happy in the long-term if she does not come to peace with her past and learn and grow from it.
If you want to be there for her, then you must do so without any expectations of a relationship afterwards because then you aren't doing it for the right reasons. If you think she needs help etc then by all means be there for her, but that does not mean that there will be a relationship in it for you at the end.
Coming to terms with being cheated on takes time, to varying degrees for some people. If you are really willing to wait for her then that is your choice. But she must come to a decision for herself and you can't really speed up the process. She needs to refind herself and self-confidence and validation from herself and not from a guy. Let her figure this out but reach out if you are worried about her.
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