On day 2 of fight need help?

Hey so here's the gist- my boyfriend doesn't like me not being here, he basically insists that im the only thing that makes his life ok, but i have family and friends who i love and love to see, whom he's never gotten along with, so he never comes with me. I basically have to ask his permission then deal with a bit of an attitude for awhile. I have anxiety so i snapped & last night he said 'he didn't want to hold me back' (its hard to go out with anxiety so its a big deal for me to anjoy going out) and that things would only get worse. I thought it was his roundabout way of letting me go... we slept on it, and now he's basically asking me to go along with it, and thats it, i need to ask his permission, put up with the attitude, limit going out as often as poss, and its going to get worse! We've been together 10 years. Am i an asshole? I dont know what to do. he's implied if i ever left him hed kill himself, or at least give up on everything. I do love him though, does that count if im miserable? Im so screwed.
On day 2 of fight need help?
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