Why won't my ex boyfriend not want to be my friend now when he said before that he cared about me and still wanted to stay friends at least?

Break Up & Divorce

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Why won't my ex boyfriend not want to be my friend now when he said before that he cared about me and still wanted to stay friends at least?
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Maybe because he is hurting. Men are strange creatures. I still love my ex. I care about her deeply and know id take her back in a second but she hurt me so i can't be her friend as id always want what we had before.

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    • That's how I feel about him since he's hurting do you think he'll come back to me? I am well am so hurt by him

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    • When we were together

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    • See I've never done that and maybe and sorry to say this but you are better off without him.
      I've never cheated or even kissed another female when im in a relationshio. All my partners have been a lot younger than me as my emotional level is higher than a younger guy and i know how to treat my partners. But they have all hurt me because if my soft heart. Men say thing sonetimes they don't mean but kissing someone to me is betrayal and i couldnt be with someone who fid that in front of me.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Having recently broken up with my ex, it was my choice to refuse contact with him. This was because I was and am hurting. I am still in love with him, but I know that we were not working and have to work on getting over him now, and if I was to be in contact with him then it would take me longer or hurt me even more to try and continue as if our relationship didn't happen. This is probably his reasoning, he wants to move on from the relationship but needs time. Often with any serious relationship there has to be a no-contact period for both parties to come to terms with the ending of the relationship, this is common and allows for people to heal. It doesn't mean that you cannot ever be friends, but to go back to being friends immediately after breaking up is often difficult to do for at least one of the parties. He is hurting and needs time.

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    • Well if he ended things with me and chose no contact with me do you think he'll come back around and message me?

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    • This is possible that he really does intend to become friends after a no-contact period or he could have just said that so that he didn't hurt you too much and 'softened the blow' about the break up. You know his character better than I do, be honest with yourself and think about which is more likely. Either way, during the no-contact you should keep yourself busy and distracted and not get too caught up thinking about him during this time because depending on how well you get over the break up will depend on whether there can be a friendship at the end.

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What Girls Said 1

  • That's usually a thing people say to try and soften the blow. They usually don't mean it because memories/tension.

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    • Well a couple weeks ago I ended things and wanted to stay friends and he said he really wanted to and didn't want to walk away any less then that then a few days ago he broke up with me and said he doesn't want to be friends now

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    • Maybe he realized he couldn't do it because it would be too emotional for him. Give it time, just remember being friends with ex's are hard. If you guys are meant to be friends, it'll happen over time. I wouldn't push him though.

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