We have been going through marriage counseling for weeks, we don't touch each other and I have no romantic or loving feelings for him other than like a brother. Yet when I look at him, I know that he's still in love with me, it would kill him for me to walk out on him. I wonder why I can't have the feelings I used to have of just never even considering that there might be someone else out there for me. We have no kids, but we have a home, pets and 12 years. I will be settling if I stay because I will never be more than content, but I can't leave.. hurting him is whats keeping me here, he knows im not in love with him. Why is it so hard to leave? and what should I do? I feel like rose on the titanic when she runs to jump ship and im drowning inside.